tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37326797198963634592024-03-05T04:17:04.113-07:00Our Family's JourneyThrough Bethany's LensUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger369125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-37114548637311424412021-04-01T11:14:00.000-06:002021-04-01T11:14:06.386-06:00Measured<p> Oh wow. It has been a very, <i>very</i> long time since I have posted a blog. But, here I am again. I recently wrote a little article for our homeschool co-op and thought I'd share it here as well. </p><br /><br />Over the last year or so, I’ve become increasingly aware of my insecurities as a homeschooling mom. What’s odd is that I have been homeschooling for about 9 years--but the first several years of homeschooling were spent outside the United States where I was one of the only homeschoolers in our missionary community. Moving to a homeschool-saturated area sparked the temptation to compare myself to other homeschooling moms around me. All it would take was seeing another mom’s post on Facebook or overhearing a conversation about a child’s accomplishments or even a simple assignment and I would be off and running down a dark road of doubt and insecurity about how I had “messed up my kids for life.” <br /><br />The Lord met me in these dark places and shined His light into the insecure, doubt-filled darkness. A few new thoughts emerged as I leaned in and listened to the Lord:<br /><br /><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0px 0px 0px 40px; padding: 0px; text-align: left;">1. While the world around me uses measurements like grades, standardized test scores, and degrees, the only “measure” I need is God’s Word.<br /> 2. Influences like social media, Pinterest, homeschooling blogs and websites feed the insatiable sin nature of comparison! Comparison leads to discontentment, self-doubt, and insecurity. That insecurity leads to relying on self and the temporal things of this world. On the flip-side, comparison can also lead to self-righteousness, pride, and an unteachable spirit.<br />3. God has a plan for each one of my children and the preparation for that plan includes me as a homeschooling mom. The preparation may not match what the world considers preparation.</blockquote><br />In 2 Peter 1:2-4 it says, “His divine power has granted to us <b>all things that pertain to life and godliness</b>, through the knowledge of Him who called us to His own glory and excellence...having <b>escaped from the corruption that is in the world</b> because of sinful desire.” For me, that corruption often looks like comparison and grasping for control over all things as a homeschooling mom. I need to be reminded that while “<b>some trust in chariots and some in horses</b> {<i>things of the world like curriculum, programs, scores, degrees, salaries</i>}, <b>but [I] trust in the name of the LORD our God.</b> (Psalm 20:7) This particular verse in Psalm 20 has shed so much light on the hope I put in everything except God! Yes, I am to train my children, teach my children, sometimes even test my children; however, my hope and trust needs to be in the Lord and His standards and measurements rather than in the standards and measurements of the world. I need to entrust unto Jesus my children and their futures. He has proven through Scripture that His sovereign plans come to pass and He even uses the people that society views as “not properly educated or prepared” to bring Him Glory through those plans. <br /><br />Personally, I needed to “turn off” the societal voices around me that were distracting me from God’s voice and direction. With God’s grace and strength, I try to remember that God has His own “Individualized Education Plan” for each one of my kids that is designed by Him for His Glory and their good. While there may be the temptation to read this and get caught in the trap of comparison, I hope it acts as the impetus for conversation--with God. Let me encourage you to ask yourself these questions:<br /><br /><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0px 0px 0px 40px; padding: 0px; text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijCJDne5TP3NYyb1O4HiMfW0HTPEw-sd_Yyyx3feXaw4KlPoaxwYsG11ZZT14D5LW2vyg3AH-YX2l11Poh5A1UzKZS3kJPb_x4idmr4iEr-LhvqTVRU9yNwfLnibMMaTRNWTOmMcoUdRI/s2048/Measured+Photo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="2044" height="223" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijCJDne5TP3NYyb1O4HiMfW0HTPEw-sd_Yyyx3feXaw4KlPoaxwYsG11ZZT14D5LW2vyg3AH-YX2l11Poh5A1UzKZS3kJPb_x4idmr4iEr-LhvqTVRU9yNwfLnibMMaTRNWTOmMcoUdRI/w222-h223/Measured+Photo.JPG" width="222" /></a></div>1. Do you trust that God loves you, your child(ren) and has a plan for each one of you?<br /> 2. What worldly measurements are deceiving you and creating self-doubt and insecurity? What comparisons are you making that steal from you the contentment and security found in Jesus and His provision for all things that pertain to life?<br />3. What distractions are keeping you from hearing God’s voice, especially as it relates to motherhood?</blockquote><br />My prayer for you, the readers, is that Jesus may be your measure and guide as you seek to follow Him. To God be the Glory. <br /><br /><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-70785719732080468072020-04-23T13:51:00.002-06:002020-04-26T08:47:23.657-06:00Post-Enslavement Grumbling<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Exodus 16 starts out:</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> “</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The whole Israelite community set out from Elim and came to the Desert of Sin, which is between Elim and Sinai, on the fifteenth day of the second month after they had come out of Egypt.</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> In the desert the whole community grumbled against Moses and Aaron. The Israelites said to them, “If only we had died by the Lord’s hand in Egypt! There we sat around pots of meat and ate all the food we wanted, but you have brought us out into this desert to starve this entire assembly to death.” </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Newly freed Israel now grumbles and wishes that they were back in slavery because at least when they were enslaved they got to eat meat and “all the food [they] wanted.” What they didn’t know was that God had plans to provide for their ‘hangry-selves’--manna and quail was about to rain down from Heaven. They were begging to trade freedom for “food they wanted.” Admittedly, I get it--on many levels. The thing is--what “was” may have been familiar and somewhat satisfying at times, but it wasn’t great--it was just known. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We, like the Israelites, will soon be released into “freedom” in various phases from the cage of coronavirus quarantine. And...how long before we start grumbling about life’s circumstances. Some may argue. “No! I won’t. I’ll have a new perspective. I’ll be so thankful.”</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Look at the date stamp in Exodus 16. “On the 15th day of the 2nd month” of freedom the Israelites were begging to be enslaved again--for the food.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We are a seemingly never satisfied people--at least not this side of Heaven. The question is: how can we live in contentment in the present? Paul speaks of this in the often quoted letter to the Phillipians. He says, “...</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” So, it seems that it’s not that we have strength to do whatever </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">we</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> want through Jesus...we are given strength by Jesus to handle what life’s circumstances bring. Contentment regardless of circumstance. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Yeah, that’s hard to embrace. It gives me hope that Paul said he had “to learn” to be content. It doesn’t just happen.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Without Jesus and the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives, hearts, and minds, we have the propensity to return to a state of discontent. Kind of like entropy--the inevitable return to chaos. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">However, a little bit earlier in Paul’s letter to the Phillipians, he reminds them:</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">.”</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">What I love about this part of the letter is that it acknowledges that we have wants. God tells us to present those to Him--humbly and with a thankful heart that trusts that just as God provided manna and quail, He will provide for our needs...<i>and even our wants</i>... according to His goodness and omniscience. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It might be interesting to note that not long after the provision of manna and quail, the Israelites were back to grumbling about being thirsty. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As we re-enter the “new normal” of post-quarantine life: </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">may we be aware of our heart's propensity for more OR less in life</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">may we have eyes for the provision of God for our needs and wants </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">may we strive to learn to be content</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">may we be mindful to be thankful for God’s mercy and tender goodness </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">may we not fall back into an enslaved lifestyle because it is familiar</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">may we take the opportunity to reset habits and routines that are healthier having had the opportunity to experience a different way of life</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">What “may we’s” would YOU add?</span></span></div>
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-87140244917362315782020-03-29T10:31:00.000-06:002020-03-29T12:22:15.638-06:00The Judgement and Mercy of Calamity<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Isaiah 45:5-7 reads: </span><br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I am the LORD, and there is no other, </span></span> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Besides me there is no God; </span></span> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I equip you, though you do not know me, t</span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">hat people may know, </span></span> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">f</span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="white-space: pre-wrap;">rom the rising of </span></span><span style="white-space: pre-wrap;">the</span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="white-space: pre-wrap;"> sun and from the west that there is none besides me;</span></span></span> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I am the LORD, and there is no other.</span></span> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I form the light and create darkness; </span></span> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I make well-being and create calamity;</span></span></b> </span></blockquote>
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<b><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I am the LORD who does all these things.</span></span></b></blockquote>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As an individual, family, community, nation, world -- how have we turned from God? How have we twisted and defiled God’s creation, nature order, His law and mandates? How have we replaced him with lesser gods--money, security, activity, academics, sports, entertainment, indulgence, busyness...even ministry? What good things have we made best? </span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The current Shelter-in-Place might shed some light on what we have replaced God with on the throne of our hearts. Anything other than God is an empty idol that can’t save us. As Isaiah 45: 5-7 says, “I am the LORD, and there is NO other.”</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The part that says<b> “I make well-being and create calamity” </b>hit me hard. Calamity certainly seems to describe the virus that has stricken the world. Sobering thought. However, it seems that calamity contains both God’s Judgement and His Mercy. </span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">How can this current calamity turn our wayward, prone to idolatry-prone hearts back to God? Will this be an impetus to return to the narrow path that leads to everlasting, eternal life with the God who created us? Will we return to the loving protection of the one true God? </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">God’s ultimate protection is Salvation--exchanging eternal separation from Our Creator [death] <i><b>for </b></i>eternal life with God who created us to be in an intimate, life-giving relationship with Him forever. This Salvation is available to us through Jesus--the bridge between us and God. Jesus who looked death in the face and conquered it thus making a way for us to cross from death to life...from eternal darkness to eternal light. </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">May this current calamity shed light on our wayward and idolatrous hearts--may it cause us to turn back to our Creator. As it goes on to say in Isaiah 45:</span></span></div>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Shower, O heavens, from above, </span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">and let the clouds rain down righteousness; </span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">let the earth open, that salvation and righteousness may bear fruit;</span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> let the earth cause them both to sprout;</span></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> I the Lord have created it."</span></span></span></blockquote>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-83713850501305542872019-12-03T21:27:00.002-07:002019-12-03T21:27:26.243-07:00The Idolatry of Tradition<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Funny how my depravity drives me to write and then share it with the world.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I know it was just last Christmas season that I wrote about how I needed to make room for Baby Jesus in my hot mess...and here I am again...clearly having not learned this lesson on a deep enough level. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We have been working on a house project and the house is rather messy...and rather...deconstructed. Thinking of decorating for Christmas in this mess is challenging. It has also been challenging for a couple of the kids too. This past semester has also been much busier than semester’s past--hello high school! Just trying to find a night where we were all home to decorate for Christmas was a challenge!</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I’ve been getting a lot of questions like:</span></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When can we decorate the tree? </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">{We usually try for the first of December...but that didn’t happen.}</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Are we going to make cookies for when we decorate the tree? </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">{Quite honestly, now that I am gluten-free...I am not excited about this cookie baking thing.}</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Will the project be finished before we decorate? </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">{We might be looking at a February or March project completion date.}</span></span></li>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">To top it all off, we still haven’t taken our annual Christmas Card photo. I can’t even….there are no words.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As I started to get stressed and upset about both my internal desires and expectations and the expectations and desires of my kids, I realized how much of an <b>idol</b> I make our Christmas traditions. I make the “good things” of Christmas the “best” things of Christmas. I get so focused on the little things that I forget the BEST thing. I have passed this on to my kids. We talked about it--named it, faced it, confessed it….and yet, still struggle with it. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Yet again, I am reminded of </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Psalm 51:16-17 </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">which says “</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it; you will not be pleased with a burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.”</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">While our good deeds (and perhaps the good traditions) are an expression of our faith, the BEST thing we can “do” is humbly come before the King of Kings, Jesus Christ, and offer our hearts--confessing our pride and our brokeness. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">So, here I am publicly confessing my brokeness and pride and idolatry. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">And...I am so glad that Christmas reminds me of the HOPE I have and the HOPE that is to come. The GRACE that is mine through Christ. I hope that you too will be reminded of the HOPE you have and the GRACE that is available through Christ. </span></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWEuGfrj_AW-6TmPkyXygK0hUiA3fZG-w3M5Oo_lNyBT40YDcY7yc-h7Jld16GBrupbsa-E0JcR-noVzUyDIgEhwPoiopqz7ehSpAjqO4T8p3iaoswsHi8bLtM7mr22QUCnJ9b5Xb7XOA/s1600/IMG_3039-001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1343" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWEuGfrj_AW-6TmPkyXygK0hUiA3fZG-w3M5Oo_lNyBT40YDcY7yc-h7Jld16GBrupbsa-E0JcR-noVzUyDIgEhwPoiopqz7ehSpAjqO4T8p3iaoswsHi8bLtM7mr22QUCnJ9b5Xb7XOA/s320/IMG_3039-001.JPG" width="268" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A Time of Reflection</td></tr>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-13970685352205114342019-02-08T07:51:00.000-07:002019-02-08T07:51:11.304-07:00Familiar Enslavement<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I’ve been considering writing a devotional. This is a bit ironic seeing as I don’t like using a devotional book; however, I know others enjoy them. My father-in-law actually planted the idea and it has been simmering ever since.</span></span></div>
<b id="docs-internal-guid-342235eb-7fff-ed29-0537-eae0c82f975e" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></b>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I think I’d name it </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Mornings with Moses</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. We’d camp out in Exodus. I really like Exodus. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I was reading in Exodus 14 this week. The Israelites have left their prison of Egypt with the Egyptians following after them in pursuit. The newly liberated Israelites, albeit unsettled and likely full of emotion, cry out to the Lord and yell at Moses:</span></span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></b>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Why did you bring us out here to die in the wilderness? Weren’t there enough graves for us in Egypt? What have you done to us? Why did you make us leave Egypt? Didn’t we tell you this would happen while we were still in Egypt? We said, ‘Leave us alone! </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><u>Let us be slaves to the Egyptians.</u></span></b></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> It’s better to be slave in Egypt than a corpse in the wilderness!” (</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Exodus 14:11-12, </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">emphasis mine</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Wow. Weren’t they just complaining about all the work they were forced to do. They were slaves after all! Now they are on the path to freedom--headed to the Promised Land--and they ask to return to enslavement. But enslavement was </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">familiar</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. They knew how slavery worked. There was a false sense of security in their enslavement. Harmful, unhealthy, </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">yet familiar</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. What lay ahead was unknown--even though God was paving the way and making His presence known.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I wondered…</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What am I enslaved to that is harmful, hurtful, or unhealthy </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">yet</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> familiar? What are you enslaved to?</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Shopping? Facebook? Instagram? Pinterest? Entertainment? Junk food? </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Perhaps the enslavement is a bit deeper.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Pride? Self-righteousness? Anger? Indifference? Fear? </span></span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Thankfully, the same God, who patiently and lovingly, continued to lead the Israelites from a place of slavery to a place of freedom, loves us and desires to break us out of our prisons of sin through the sacrifice and gift of grace in Jesus. We can walk in freedom. We too can be children of God. We don’t need to return to places of slavery and the illusion of security they provide. Familiar doesn’t equal healthy and free. What do you need to be freed from today?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-34692672832735856352018-12-05T14:46:00.001-07:002018-12-05T14:46:51.389-07:00Making Room for Baby Jesus in the Hot Mess<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>The house just isn’t clean enough to decorate. I need a few more days to get things organized. Where are we going to fit the Christmas tree this year? I don’t want to rearrange the furniture. I haven’t made Christmas cookies yet. It doesn’t really FEEL like Christmas.</i></span></span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></b>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And yet... we decorated. We moved the chair over to accommodate the Christmas tree. We baked and ate a whole batch of cookies. The rest of the house stayed messy. It didn’t really FEEL like Christmas...but it was fun to remember the stories behind each ornament and be together as a family despite it being far later into the night than we expected to be up decorating a tree.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">There are a few things going on in the scenarios above that have provided insight into my soul.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The first thing: When did I reduce Christmas to a <b>feeling</b>? When I make Christmas about how I <b>feel</b>, I make Christmas all about me. Christmas is far more than my feelings. Christmas is far more than a warm fuzzy feeling. Christmas is the celebration of a monumental event that opened up Heaven to all people. Christmas is the celebration of the event in which Jesus left his rightful and perfect place in Heaven and clothed himself with a human body in order to live on this messy side of Heaven. Christmas is a celebration of the birth of the Son of God who would, 33 years later, cloth himself with the sin of humankind and give up his life and die to pay the price that our sin costs. He would RISE again, thus conquering death, and forever making a way for us to be adopted into the family of God. While this may stir up feelings, Christmas is not to be reduced to a feeling. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The second thing: When I invited Jesus into my life...He didn’t enter a perfectly 'pinterested' life...He entered a <b>hot mess</b>. Decorating for Christmas, while my house remained in a state of chaos and mess, was a very tangible reminder that Jesus lives amongst the mess in our hearts and lives. We might have to move some stuff around (and throw some stuff out) to make room. He helps us clean up. He inspires us to redecorate. He even sits down in the mess with us and helps us pick through what needs to stay and what needs to go. My house…{my life}....can be messy and yet I can still put up the tree and lights and decorations. And when we turn off all the lights except for the Christmas tree lights, and the room is filled with the soft glow of twinkling lights, the mess fades. It will be worked on the next day but for now, it is enough to rest in the Light and the Peace of knowing Emmanuel--God with us. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Good reminders. Needed reminders. </span></span></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-60338043863042679222018-04-05T15:50:00.000-06:002018-04-07T06:52:25.151-06:00Musings on Life as a Consultant (Not a title I EVER thought I'd have!)<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">My brain works OVERTIME <b>all.the.time</b>. I am learning that it is part of who I am. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Since I recently jumped into the world of what could be considered Multi-Level-Marketing {MLM}, I have been pondering and researching both the product and the concept of MLM.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">In the last 24 hours, I have swung from being totally stoked and excited <b>to</b> hugely regretful <b>to </b>somewhere in the middle which is probably better than either extreme.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">My intense 24 hour sprint can be distilled into these points:</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There is nothing perfect THIS side of Heaven. We live in a broken world, with broken people and broken systems. That is why we need Jesus and through Him will one day live in a perfect eternity.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">MLM businesses are not in and of themselves evil. It is business. Even when you buy from Walmart or Amazon, more than one person benefits. (Yes, I realize this is over-simplified.) However, pushing a product is not my goal. If I have already been too pushy, FORGIVE ME. There is a learning curve both mentally and spiritually in this for me. I vow to NOT be pushy from this point forward. {<a href="https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/how-not-to-do-multi-level-marketing/">Here</a> is a great article I read regarding Christianity and MLMs.} </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As mentioned in this article, money is not the end goal. That was a good reminder. My hope is to put this product into the hands of guests and this seemed the best way to do it! Just the body cloth alone would have been awesome to have in hot and humid Nicaragua! This whole thing is yet another opportunity to grow, learn, be sanctified, be in relationship with people, and learn stewardship.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There is a scientific learning curve here as well. There is a difference between STERILE and mold/mildew/bacterial odor inhibiting properties. Micro-silver infused microfiber does NOT mean STERILE. The microsilver is not cleaning the surface you are cleaning, it is inhibiting bacterial growth in the cloth itself. So, this means, we don’t want to wipe up raw chicken juice and then turn around and wipe our kid’s hands with the cloth. {<i>Well, I wouldn’t!</i>} I, personally, wash the cloths often...and I have a designated and dedicated cloths for different jobs. I am still ME after all! However, silver (and its oxidizing properties) DO interrupt normal cell processes of a bacterium--it disrupts transmembrane transport which shuts down the life-supporting functions of the cell. There is lots of research on microsilver! LOTS! </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Microfiber is indeed a GREAT product. Microfiber DOES pick up more than a cotton cloth or a one-use wipe. It acts like a vacuum. Are there other cheaper versions of microfiber out there? Yup. I have my own reasons for choosing to purchase through this particular company. One of which is how the fiber is designed. My reasons may not be enough for you. That’s ok. Really, it is.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Like many things, this is probably seasonal. Just as I only changed diapers for a season and drove to preschool three times a week for a season, this is part of my journey RIGHT NOW. I pray God uses it to His Glory! I hope I can meet some new people and have some great conversations! One of the aspects of MLMs is the relational nature of how the business works. It connects people with people--in real life, real time! With social media like it is, we seem to have less face-to-face connection with people and that is affecting "community." When I hosted my party, I met neighbors I hadn't meet before! It served as a platform for people to come together that wouldn't have otherwise come together. Just one of the "perks."</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">One of the aspects of this that I like is that I feel like I am doing something to care for the Creation designed by God. He put us, as humans, in a position of stewardship over this planet. I want to do my part.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><i>{ALL opinions here are those of Bethany. You may disagree. I just ask that you refrain from being mean about it!} </i></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Thanks for letting me process this here, as well as, giving me the room to be “in process.” </span></span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-6450372551771570382018-03-05T17:39:00.000-07:002018-03-05T17:40:45.752-07:00Within or BeyondI am attempting one of those Bible reading plans. Admittedly, I am not following the schedule very well. However, it does get me reading large chunks of Scripture in one sitting which has its own benefits. The other morning the passage included Exodus 3 & 4. As Exodus is one of my favorite books in the Bible, I have read it many times. However, this particular morning, I noticed something I had not taken notice of before.<br />
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When God calls Moses through the burning bush, it starts a dialogue between God and Moses. God tells Moses what He wants Moses to do -- and you'd think, when God asks you personally in an audible voice to do something -- you'd get right on it! Yet, Moses starts to argue and make up reasons why he can't carry out God's plans. This goes on for a couple of rounds. Then, God tells Moses to throw his staff on the ground. Moses does it without argument. God asks Moses to pick up the staff (that has now been transformed into a snake). AND MOSES DOES IT! The same pattern occurs when God asks Moses to put his hand in his cloak -- once to reveal spontaneously contracted leprosy and then miraculous healing of the same hand. So, now that God has established His infinite power, He goes back to giving Moses the plan. And Moses goes back to arguing.<br />
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It struck me that when God asks Moses to do something that is WITHIN Moses' ability, like throwing or moving his hand, Moses doesn't argue. However, when God asks Moses to do something BEYOND Moses' ability, Moses starts to make excuses and argue with God. In fact, Moses argues so much with God that it says the LORD's anger burned against Moses.<br />
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How often do I argue or delay or worry or make excuses (all acts of distrust and disobedience) when God asks me to do something beyond my ability? And yet, how quick am I to move forward in a task in which I know I am capable of doing and will likely even appear successful? <br />
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It is so easy to do the jobs that we perceive we can do. It was easy for Moses to toss a staff onto the ground and even pick up the end of a snake. It is a different story altogether when the job seems far beyond our skill set, ability, and even vision. And yet, God's power remains constant regardless of task--whether within or beyond our own ability.<br />
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Where are we dragging our feet in obedience to what God might be calling us to be/do because it feels BEYOND OUR ABILITY? <br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-13911425250545102852017-11-26T21:16:00.001-07:002017-11-26T21:16:41.503-07:00If It's Not Virtual, It's Not Real<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-position: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Because we didn’t post about our trip to Nicaragua on social media prior to departure, I’ll admit that it didn’t feel like we were really going. It is a little bit funny and a whole lot disturbing that the virtual side of life feels like it makes real life ‘real.’ </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-position: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We knew that our 10 day trip, in which two of those days were travel days, would present scheduling issues regarding how to see everyone that we wanted to see and do everything we wanted to do in such a short period of time. Inevitably, there would be people we would not be able to visit and there was great potential for feelings to be hurt. Sadly, it was unavoidable. However, we felt that one of the ways to ‘control’ the itinerary and manage the wants and needs of our family and ex-pats and nationals alike, was to keep the news of our visit off of social media. So, if you felt surprised at the news that we had visited Nicaragua, you were in the majority. In fact, it felt a little surprising to me too as the day approached!</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-position: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The main impetus for us returning to Nicaragua was because Jeff was invited to be the speaker/facilitator for the annual men’s retreat hosted by the international fellowship that we attended during our years in Nicaragua. Thankfully, we had some funds remaining in our associate account at Christian Veterinary Mission which helped make it possible for our whole family to accompany Jeff to Nicaragua. We felt that it was important that for the first ‘return’ trip to our former home and field of service, the whole family have the opportunity to experience it together. This trip was not only an opportunity to visit friends and places that we hold dear in our hearts but also a way to serve and care for the missionary community in a different capacity. Granted, I served in an ‘old’ way as I offered photo shoots for some of the graduating seniors and a couple of families.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-position: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Despite the fact that it didn’t feel ‘real’ prior to our arrival into the country, upon landing, the sights and sounds and feels and smells of Nicaragua reminded us that it was indeed real! </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-position: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As we continue to distill the thoughts and emotions surrounding this visit, we will be posting here on the blog...so continue to stay tuned!</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-position: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-position: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>The Sights (And Sounds) of Nicaragua</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-position: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b style="font-style: normal;">(</b><i>It felt different to takes pictures of 'life' as a non-resident.)</i></span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjErNuDeRmk1PUUlmHoqO9Ari0rW2Ej3Bv7DlXpOO50_suhpJvSYo-uMMpKFTbuwY1nXkmJ71heb2z7mUdi_P2M-ceh2EbLXjC5kpok_2sq80XUNFRlxJIVjWk_Cy8TD-Rh6BQw4bpcOxQ/s1600/IMG_984737.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjErNuDeRmk1PUUlmHoqO9Ari0rW2Ej3Bv7DlXpOO50_suhpJvSYo-uMMpKFTbuwY1nXkmJ71heb2z7mUdi_P2M-ceh2EbLXjC5kpok_2sq80XUNFRlxJIVjWk_Cy8TD-Rh6BQw4bpcOxQ/s320/IMG_984737.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiJy4SXGvgLbYb0I34oEEnF_fvKD75eZTsZo1f9n2uASGbT38Q5IIPg-hWUjqLN8Aqi7rsLxFX2BkS_vpTtmdGc0efeaVZGvxDSpM_z9QaY8WbDmh6FWZiJrdh3Fq2nVKAsZUFLTw6Vog/s1600/IMG_985448.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiJy4SXGvgLbYb0I34oEEnF_fvKD75eZTsZo1f9n2uASGbT38Q5IIPg-hWUjqLN8Aqi7rsLxFX2BkS_vpTtmdGc0efeaVZGvxDSpM_z9QaY8WbDmh6FWZiJrdh3Fq2nVKAsZUFLTw6Vog/s320/IMG_985448.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Interestingly that is our old car in the background.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7ep8H-WySaM-_A0dHdqtvg6fz67fc14AxcGPCQv0MtkuHraPm3pknVg1jikFC21qKmBy17IWe3Dr_ex_Ry4aeP9eFmi2OGDJ-1EskUs-al_N94QjgnfNqXZScyNY4x0cIsJg3PoC81DU/s1600/IMG_983527.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7ep8H-WySaM-_A0dHdqtvg6fz67fc14AxcGPCQv0MtkuHraPm3pknVg1jikFC21qKmBy17IWe3Dr_ex_Ry4aeP9eFmi2OGDJ-1EskUs-al_N94QjgnfNqXZScyNY4x0cIsJg3PoC81DU/s320/IMG_983527.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I assure you that the WAWA is in 'signage' only!</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzgGTZ2KfsohisfiLhyphenhyphen6ttv61ducj2i8c5uZYzkEkJByOVXmMUktEvZhmkq6XG9PbzLNfJXf8hnkpeULNOJYD-vdMkuDkBAN8g0x23H510PRj6mglgmQWq4QB9WDNgVI5UIe4nwTWxMoA/s1600/IMG_986759.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzgGTZ2KfsohisfiLhyphenhyphen6ttv61ducj2i8c5uZYzkEkJByOVXmMUktEvZhmkq6XG9PbzLNfJXf8hnkpeULNOJYD-vdMkuDkBAN8g0x23H510PRj6mglgmQWq4QB9WDNgVI5UIe4nwTWxMoA/s320/IMG_986759.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It is perfectly normal to have 7-10 men each sitting on a series of<br />telephone poles to run a line. Safety First is so overrated.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVQfEht2F2pjHqjKzCVr_7kUkUd6lstrGLhjHomd1sRn3FjVafsjvPVXkFf079Hko9HAtj2T7DEBA8IVXgNsy6ELbQ-RlEQh9ETQMf1NnHbkdjjgLCWRGUR_G7VOUm9U1z19Za-vWZC1Q/s1600/IMG_982618.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVQfEht2F2pjHqjKzCVr_7kUkUd6lstrGLhjHomd1sRn3FjVafsjvPVXkFf079Hko9HAtj2T7DEBA8IVXgNsy6ELbQ-RlEQh9ETQMf1NnHbkdjjgLCWRGUR_G7VOUm9U1z19Za-vWZC1Q/s320/IMG_982618.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Side of the Road Cheese Vendors</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEis_rH0VpkVXGQwPsspoaFe_DQ8PS19PDXRmOm6TdEPsBkwOZkoOHcUa5WDTMvZXKXE_JYGVYGEcSplxnl0Dl9K30jl8TVVixfQ81KvyOFI5jc15a2Vsltc85b9wmaoapoyZNARO5FxTJY/s1600/IMG_015819.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1067" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEis_rH0VpkVXGQwPsspoaFe_DQ8PS19PDXRmOm6TdEPsBkwOZkoOHcUa5WDTMvZXKXE_JYGVYGEcSplxnl0Dl9K30jl8TVVixfQ81KvyOFI5jc15a2Vsltc85b9wmaoapoyZNARO5FxTJY/s320/IMG_015819.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The drive up to our old neighborhood. </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSyJ_9jt1fCurFlmEwDYsWvK2ecPnU3Vrb4BYNzI4oGOrI2ome0ualCmRmfjNeMa71XKgoy9GPsPyCEFCE5dlSCVSEnyXgCfbHnXG-H_5_qJZDydg4mTl1U2QsInpXDO_vuNUEe1enwc8/s1600/IMG_014910.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSyJ_9jt1fCurFlmEwDYsWvK2ecPnU3Vrb4BYNzI4oGOrI2ome0ualCmRmfjNeMa71XKgoy9GPsPyCEFCE5dlSCVSEnyXgCfbHnXG-H_5_qJZDydg4mTl1U2QsInpXDO_vuNUEe1enwc8/s320/IMG_014910.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Only two guys sitting up top...there is so much room for more!</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWZvsEix6lM0ZL2COVxRjfGOwC0Rfn3kNb_X7OrRpeeeIe2EzT0UYU4FHlpEa1_rMpKVCc-M40bJrDleUWnAxaeyVh7ArWL9dIVVCRWCYXlJQdOT-J3ACobF6qaE0mTxJsA6QgoCJ-J2g/s1600/IMG_985142.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWZvsEix6lM0ZL2COVxRjfGOwC0Rfn3kNb_X7OrRpeeeIe2EzT0UYU4FHlpEa1_rMpKVCc-M40bJrDleUWnAxaeyVh7ArWL9dIVVCRWCYXlJQdOT-J3ACobF6qaE0mTxJsA6QgoCJ-J2g/s320/IMG_985142.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Food Vender set up next to shipping container turned police office.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFwoMEnjO4lCz1jUsaXGS0ay-6AP3wp4ksEYEHoNxMikamMFmDKrZ4qjaml_ILPduDpiVzqpXu8uDxZxXQr37kKqJdDOjWHQCWTsCiJnNjuQcp4jyOJhyNIJYhwyAFd9qJyMpLe6BerT4/s1600/IMG_987062_edited-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFwoMEnjO4lCz1jUsaXGS0ay-6AP3wp4ksEYEHoNxMikamMFmDKrZ4qjaml_ILPduDpiVzqpXu8uDxZxXQr37kKqJdDOjWHQCWTsCiJnNjuQcp4jyOJhyNIJYhwyAFd9qJyMpLe6BerT4/s320/IMG_987062_edited-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Horse Drawn Cart</td></tr>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-65197594670635578482017-11-25T13:12:00.000-07:002017-11-25T13:26:51.338-07:00The Pre-Trip "MOMENT" <div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Before I post about our actual trip to Nicaragua, let me share what happened ‘pre-trip.’ Seriously, there is always ‘something’ that happens right before we are supposed to leave for a trip. When we moved to Nicaragua, if you remember, we were told at the ticket counter </span></span><span style="white-space: pre-wrap;">that we couldn’t fly out since our tickets were ‘one-way.’ That was </span><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">AFTER we had been dropped off 1.5 hours from home with all of our belongings (including a cat) at 5 o’clock in THE MORNING. That was that trip's "moment." Clearly, we got it all straightened out because we did indeed move to Nicaragua that day. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">So, our scheduled dates for this past visit to Nicaragua {which was our FIRST TIME BACK}, were November 9-19. Emotions were high. There was lots of excitement to 'return.' To travel to Nicaragua (and most other international destinations), your passport expiration date canNOT be within six months of expiration. {How many of you just went to check your passports?} I had checked all five of our passports when I bought our tickets and would have bet money (um, the price of 5 tickets to Nicaragua) that our ‘dates’ were fine. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">On the morning of November 8th, the morning before our flight {as in 24 hours prior to travel}, I got our passports out of safe-keeping and just happened to look at the dates again. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Here it is. <b>HERE is the MOMENT.</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Jeff and I’s passports had an expiration date of February 2018. Um, that is like 3 months away!!!! They aren't going to let us into the country (especially since there have been some changes and greater restrictions coming into Nicaragua).</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>TOTAL PANIC.</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I walk out into the living room where Jeff is conducting our homeschool Bible class and I say, </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">“We have a problem. Like a BIG problem.”</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">All eyes on me. Everyone stops breathing.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">“Our passports are going to expire in 3 months.” </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Lots of questions. Kids on the verge of tears. Scrambling to find information on-line. Frantic phone calls. Brief discussion on 'slipping someone' a hundred dollar bill at immigration. Text messages asking for prayer. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I called the Passport “people” and I get connected to a customer service representative (in record time) named Joseph. Joseph is calm and kind. He asks me what state I live in and upon hearing that I live in Colorado, he then asks how far away I live from the city of Aurora. I tell him we live about 45 minutes away. He says, “Fantastic.” {I am NOT feeling fantastic. In fact, I am still unshowered, in my pajamas, and in a state of panic. Nothing about this is fantastic.} He gives me a short of list things that we need to collect and tells me to drive up to the passport agency in Aurora, CO with all the items on the list...and don't forget to write in black ink. He says 'they will take of me of there.' By the way, these agencies do NOT exist in every state. Had we lived in Kansas...this story would have been different. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Let me pause the story for a moment and say that I believe I talked with an angel from Heaven that morning. Joseph the Angel. Seriously.</b></span></span></blockquote>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">So, back to the story...we download a passport photo app onto my phone. We take passport pictures in our dining room. By the way, NEVER have I taken a WORSE passport photo EVER! And now, I’m stuck with it for TEN YEARS!!! I even asked Jeff to re-take it (or let me take a shower and 'do' my hair)--but he looked at me with that look that said, "REALLY?!?" </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Our printer broke the night before {of course} and so we upload everything we need onto a flash drive, exchange pajamas for real clothes, pile everyone in the car and head to Staples to print the needed documents. While at Staples, a new and excellent friend shows up and gives me a hug. We print and fill out all we need and drive to Aurora.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">When we arrive, there is one other person in line at the Passport Agency. We sheepishly hand over all of our paperwork and wait to be called. Less than five minutes go by and we are standing at the passport window paying what the United States calls an “expediting fee” {other countries may or may not call it a “bribe”}. We are told to go out to lunch and come back at 2:15pm to pick up our new passports. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">WHAT?! SERIOUSLY?! AMAZING. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">So, now we have new passports with freshly stamped pages from Nicaraguan immigration...and the WORST.PHOTO.EVER. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Stay tuned for more post about our first return visit to Nicaragua.</span></div>
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-45306337728146633962017-10-31T14:04:00.002-06:002017-10-31T14:51:26.209-06:00OCD Part Two: Source of Hope<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This follow-up to my first post on OCD is well overdue. Honestly, it isn’t any easier to write about it now than it was to write about it then. It is an ugly disorder. And yet, God makes all things beautiful! </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If you remember, when I last blogged, I had results pending concerning some enlarged lymph nodes in my neck. Well, those results came back as “they look normal, just enlarged.” Those results then launched a 2 ½ month decision process of whether or not we should dig deeper or let it be. Well, for the person with OCD, both were undesirable options. However, I finally decided to ask my doctor for a recommendation to see an ENT. Because my ultrasound results didn’t show anything ‘serious’, it meant that I wasn't a priority case and would need to wait over a month to be seen by the doctor. The other option was a CT scan with contrast. So, I scheduled that. (Can I just tell you that my husband is so kind and patient and trusts God with what is needed to pay for these crazy medical expenses!)</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The whole thing was a big OCD nightmare! For months, I had been obsessed with these glands. There were times where it was impossible to think about anything else. The fear and the unknown were paralyzing. The compulsion to touch the lymph nodes and ‘evaluate’ their size was impossible to fight against. In fact, I probably made them bigger by poking at them all day long! Again, I need you to hear me...OCD isn't about the silverware being 'just so' around the place setting. It isn't about the spices being lined up perfectly in the cabinet. YES, it can manifest in this way...but it is SO MUCH deeper than that! OCD is about being trapped by your thoughts. It is about being held hostage by your own mind. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Ok, rant over. Back to the story.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The night before, I was a nervous wreck! As I am lying in bed at bedtime, praying and questioning God about the whole situation...I hear this in my mind… </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Bethany, you’re fine--you don’t have cancer. I needed to blind you like I did Paul, so you could learn.” {see Acts 9} </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">HOLD ON. WHAT?! </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There have been a handful of times in my Christian life when I have sensed clearly that God was speaking to me. THIS was one of those times.</span></span></div>
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<span style="white-space: pre-wrap;"><b><i>So, what did God need me to learn?</i></b></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The biggest lesson that I learned was this: </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My hope was NOT in God. My hope was in myself and my plans. My hope was in my idol of health. When any of those things were threatened, I lost hope. God showed me that HE is the source of hope. Like Romans 15:13 says,<span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“I pray that God, THE SOURCE OF HOPE, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in Him. THEN, you will overflow with confident HOPE through the power of the Holy Spirit.”</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> And if that wasn’t enough, 1 Corinthians 15:19 reads, </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“And if our hope in Christ is </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">only for this life</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, we are more to be pitied than anyone in the world.”</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> OUCH! That was me! </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">When my source of hope was in anything but God, fear stepped in a took over. Fear is OCD’s best friend and loves to hangout in the darkness. HOPE in Christ is what turns on the light in that dark room of fear. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">God is so merciful. It is in His mercy that He allowed me to be ‘blinded’ so that He could show me how far I had wandered from Him. Is it easy to keep Him as my source of hope? No. It needs to be a daily choice. I daily choose to place my hope in Christ alone. We are prone to wander and His Word brings us back. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDSkg5sfwiACZI0Kz4LhghtXWfL5prGJQohPrP_QOhSJIiRV_RzxynBbLqgIpGsF86UsaEWYtECz5c1-IiCwXsCt3EGFdizMgPisnFR3Nqtr9ELLWVlGeAmc4obRDRmJhCzw5nT6FisBg/s1600/images-6.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDSkg5sfwiACZI0Kz4LhghtXWfL5prGJQohPrP_QOhSJIiRV_RzxynBbLqgIpGsF86UsaEWYtECz5c1-IiCwXsCt3EGFdizMgPisnFR3Nqtr9ELLWVlGeAmc4obRDRmJhCzw5nT6FisBg/s1600/images-6.jpeg" /></a></span></div>
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P.S. <span style="white-space: pre-wrap;">{By the way...the CT scan results came back ‘clear’. The only things observed were that I did have two lymph nodes that were slightly enlarged and I have an upper tonsil that is slightly enlarged. I call it my wonky tonsil. I consulted with the ENT via email and we decided that it was just 'one of those things' and unless I had other crazy symptoms, I should just get on with life.}</span><br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-14245817868249607922017-07-25T22:53:00.000-06:002017-07-25T22:53:05.782-06:0020 Years...and Counting.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
As I sit here on the eve of our Twentieth Anniversary, it seems impossible to find the words to sum up the last twenty years (and you all know that I love words)! Marriage is an incredible journey. Truly.</div>
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Now for those who have heard our story, despite picking out my own engagement ring, when Jeff asked me to marry him, my first response was "<i>I think so.</i>" I am so glad he re-asked me and I said YES! We were all of 22 years old when we married each other and we've grown so much together in the last two decades. The beauty of marriage is that we both sharpen, shape and sand the edges of each other's lives so that we hopefully look more like Christ.<br />
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While marriage has its ups and downs, walking those TOGETHER as been beautiful (and sometimes a beautiful mess...and a little bit crazy). I said it in a Facebook post previously...but we have walked through some valleys and stood on some mountaintops....TOGETHER. We endured the loss of three children through miscarriage and we celebrated the births of three amazing kiddos (and we've made it to the teen years!) We have endured a cross-cultural move (and taking language school side-by-side) and celebrated the joys of serving together and experiencing all God had for us in Nicaragua. We have journeyed through many seasons...TOGETHER.<br />
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Back when I could sing a little (or thought I could)...I sang <i>"Grow Old Along With Me"</i> by John Lennon to Jeff at our wedding rehearsal in place of our vows (we decided our vows would be said aloud for the first time at the ceremony). We have definitely grown older (and hopefully a little wiser) through the many seasons along this marriage journey. And like the song says, we are two branches of one tree...and our roots have grown deeper and stronger both in our love for each other and in the Lord. I hope we continue to grow old alongside one another because we are better together than apart. I love and cherish the partnership and friendship that we have. I love that God picked us out for each other.<br />
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It has taken intentionality to arrive at 20 years. We have had some amazing mentors along the way...both in person and in print. We have enjoyed learning and studying about marriage. We want to continue being intentional. We want to continue to be students of marriage. Being married takes effort and investment. And it is worth it! We've watched God pour blessing and provision over that effort.<br />
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We stood before God, amongst friends and family, twenty years ago and made a covenant to God and to each other. Here are the words we vowed to each other on July 26, 1997:<br />
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Jeff's Vows<br />
<b>I, Jeffery, in faith, honesty, sincerity and love, take you Bethany to be my wedded wife. I believe that God has brought us together that we may fulfill the plan He has for our lives so that He may be glorified. I recognize and accept the responsibility and authority God as placed in my hands. I also accept the responsibility of following God's lead and patiently guiding you and the family God may entrust to us as He directs us in the course He has for our life together. I promise to selflessly guide, protect, provide, and care for you, and above all, to choose each day to love you as Christ does His Church. I promise that just as Christ is faithful to us, I will be a faithful husband by seeking to fulfill all the duties of a husband that God, in His Wisdom, has established. And although I do not know what lies ahead on this course God has set for us, I know that I will stay by your side to respect you, be sensitive to you, and to live with you in an understanding manner. Bethany, I promise to you my life as a faithful husband.</b><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-align: center;"><span style="line-height: 150%;">Bethany's Vows (no surprise, mine are longer)</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b style="text-align: center;">I, Bethany, in faith, honesty, sincerity
and love,</b><b style="text-align: center;"> take
you Jeffery to be my wedded husband. </b><b style="text-align: center;">I believe that God has brought us together
that </b><b style="text-align: center;">we may fulfill the plan He has for our
lives so that He may be glorified. </b><b style="text-align: center;">Recognizing the Lordship of Jesus Christ, </b><b style="text-align: center;">I
promise to live first unto Him, then unto you.</b><b style="text-align: center;"> Christ is the head of the Church, </b><b style="text-align: center;">in the same way the husband is the head of
his wife. </b><b style="text-align: center;">Jeffery, I submit myself to you under God’s
hand. </b><b style="text-align: center;">I promise you with all my heart, </b><b style="text-align: center;">my complete trust and respect, my deepest
devotion, esteem, and admiration. </b><b style="text-align: center;">Above all, I promise you that I will chose
each day </b><b style="text-align: center;">to love you with renewed love given by
God. </b><b style="text-align: center;">I promise you that I will strive to be
understanding when I can not comprehend, </b><b style="text-align: center;">to be patient when I want to move ahead, </b><b style="text-align: center;">to
be selfless when I want to be selfish, </b><b style="text-align: center;">to be flexible when I don’t feel like being
bent, </b><b style="text-align: center;">and most importantly I will strive to be
forgiving, </b><b style="text-align: center;">remembering that I am to forgive as Christ
forgives. </b><b style="text-align: center;">Although I do not know what lies ahead on this
course God has set for us,</b><b style="text-align: center;"> I
know that I will stay by your side to support, encourage and help you. </b><b style="text-align: center; text-indent: -1in;">Jeffery, I promise to you my life as a
faithful wife.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b style="text-align: center; text-indent: -1in;"><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-align: center; text-indent: -1in;">And no blog is truly complete without some photos. Now, believe it or not...but the first 9 years of our married life, we only had a 'FILM' camera. I know. Practically an antique now. </span></span><br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuyskhYbfvEXm8KQy15dblZYGfsM5Yz5ABv5lKFuXpvnYkxPJlWc9yZwZRbLAoDh9BxttJWJeTy1XLPIftOwDce7cXfZWe8La4YTFQfExN9Htf866LHsYoaemHeVn7RElEIyivaYY3P_c/s1600/bethany+%2526+Jeff+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1358" data-original-width="1019" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuyskhYbfvEXm8KQy15dblZYGfsM5Yz5ABv5lKFuXpvnYkxPJlWc9yZwZRbLAoDh9BxttJWJeTy1XLPIftOwDce7cXfZWe8La4YTFQfExN9Htf866LHsYoaemHeVn7RElEIyivaYY3P_c/s320/bethany+%2526+Jeff+1.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The September of our Senior Year of College...the year we got engaged.<br /></td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvDcT_k9HxrcXUJsQ57hD1WoN28JJ1edNBntbD32HETYdOoj4M4a7MLhRU_vqm3vmuTbyODg8b75lFlDbMwcX5-yNkehM4-ZgVIiplnHZcX0mgEi07HXS1NktseBGPuehLuA6RYdeEgAM/s1600/bride+and+groom.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="712" data-original-width="463" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvDcT_k9HxrcXUJsQ57hD1WoN28JJ1edNBntbD32HETYdOoj4M4a7MLhRU_vqm3vmuTbyODg8b75lFlDbMwcX5-yNkehM4-ZgVIiplnHZcX0mgEi07HXS1NktseBGPuehLuA6RYdeEgAM/s320/bride+and+groom.jpg" width="208" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Our Wedding Day</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5rXdVM7suN08cFbfk4TzF0cxbUSLdrTRZlQbtFNzYChjWjLvZepL-TSP9tpPijDngW__5cT4TnMYAM_WnRM1zdayvnzCtNzHaDpWiPYNturWDUq2uhVz1jUF7gnon4LR2rfBf2jSf1ac/s1600/anniversarypic9.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="251" data-original-width="329" height="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5rXdVM7suN08cFbfk4TzF0cxbUSLdrTRZlQbtFNzYChjWjLvZepL-TSP9tpPijDngW__5cT4TnMYAM_WnRM1zdayvnzCtNzHaDpWiPYNturWDUq2uhVz1jUF7gnon4LR2rfBf2jSf1ac/s320/anniversarypic9.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The summer of our ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY. We went backpacking.<br /></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNefcrytEYQZOTeueh1PbJp72kHkQlHcibvvnTYy1hXHdY9s9RaUmgtOPceviqz6ZO_AOALFNtYAhrRLuAVJfsI4kAjbL2hDnsqkm5FHEsZWQSPhj3JuTwD9hjOKMTvcDF72IamA0eYdw/s1600/Vet+school+grad.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="427" data-original-width="482" height="282" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNefcrytEYQZOTeueh1PbJp72kHkQlHcibvvnTYy1hXHdY9s9RaUmgtOPceviqz6ZO_AOALFNtYAhrRLuAVJfsI4kAjbL2hDnsqkm5FHEsZWQSPhj3JuTwD9hjOKMTvcDF72IamA0eYdw/s320/Vet+school+grad.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Jeff's Graduation from Vet School in 2001. I was 5 months pregnant with Andrew.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr-gw31NLduWJtSwDRfaYw81k-3EBKnPN9CpkVcKQLhb6pKz02Pyc_Cm1taQIoHMVkg7iii2pqPD-1LM8g258MJzPlIcyH-VdoijKGC6estsGo8dIt-ulNCLhyW4Qa3SGE-qq_PuYV2Zk/s1600/christmas+family+wallet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="934" data-original-width="853" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr-gw31NLduWJtSwDRfaYw81k-3EBKnPN9CpkVcKQLhb6pKz02Pyc_Cm1taQIoHMVkg7iii2pqPD-1LM8g258MJzPlIcyH-VdoijKGC6estsGo8dIt-ulNCLhyW4Qa3SGE-qq_PuYV2Zk/s320/christmas+family+wallet.jpg" width="292" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And two become three.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIBe0TQ-wo70hc7pvD7hFf-AxANLDexaVxvN9mDHxamGhcszrS8smT99mzJcINpXWmX3cTqCtbbDYrnffOLHAacSh1OEGoLV045LjtqmazGyP0IybZDMiarLY7k1Oimh0KphYUfbz0DUE/s1600/brachtfamilyof45x7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1049" data-original-width="1370" height="245" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIBe0TQ-wo70hc7pvD7hFf-AxANLDexaVxvN9mDHxamGhcszrS8smT99mzJcINpXWmX3cTqCtbbDYrnffOLHAacSh1OEGoLV045LjtqmazGyP0IybZDMiarLY7k1Oimh0KphYUfbz0DUE/s320/brachtfamilyof45x7.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And four.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkQQVvuX0NE99LtPYq9yWlX_36gxboCK0w6qp0xtNFlRUT2WjLOENvGK-4zvFDPeqJVyGst6xsq3lRUqH-WzvP_0ODFdb6RTYe-uYMU2aA9jlJMrlfTeu8Q_vseqN9p6TirBrTX22C7mE/s1600/Copy+of+IMG_17205card.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkQQVvuX0NE99LtPYq9yWlX_36gxboCK0w6qp0xtNFlRUT2WjLOENvGK-4zvFDPeqJVyGst6xsq3lRUqH-WzvP_0ODFdb6RTYe-uYMU2aA9jlJMrlfTeu8Q_vseqN9p6TirBrTX22C7mE/s320/Copy+of+IMG_17205card.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And five (then).</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdd_twPo-DvVYGncuG8ED8pBGpt83NtLUj4q5SXjd_8PPRab2U9Dd440kTE19-WaE6qXu9GuV94qkphgA5dDQgcfoc_4BEuTrqKfW6_nK7QS3tIXfhK3g7C8m2BlNGEv7wWeNQ8cxIV08/s1600/IMG_9441_edited-1topchoice.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1068" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdd_twPo-DvVYGncuG8ED8pBGpt83NtLUj4q5SXjd_8PPRab2U9Dd440kTE19-WaE6qXu9GuV94qkphgA5dDQgcfoc_4BEuTrqKfW6_nK7QS3tIXfhK3g7C8m2BlNGEv7wWeNQ8cxIV08/s320/IMG_9441_edited-1topchoice.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And now.<b><span style="font-size: 13pt; line-height: 150%;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><i> </i></span></span></b></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_uqAIjMrBlwUtIxHBzvLJEXFNyIRXu-mWdqzqU5Lj562ongzxhgZ3P4E5LrmpTPEmiymbYjGe1ttqmeRXxh9mdzSTjH3-5vWe3voOFYQBCnMXJTXlVPFm0Cct0YYKBX1wIw_MoD6l5v8/s1600/IMG_498509_edited-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_uqAIjMrBlwUtIxHBzvLJEXFNyIRXu-mWdqzqU5Lj562ongzxhgZ3P4E5LrmpTPEmiymbYjGe1ttqmeRXxh9mdzSTjH3-5vWe3voOFYQBCnMXJTXlVPFm0Cct0YYKBX1wIw_MoD6l5v8/s320/IMG_498509_edited-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">20 years. Two shall become one, then five. (God's math is funny that way).</td></tr>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="text-align: start;">My prayer is that we continue journeying together wholeheartedly--nurturing a vibrant and thriving marriage that brings glory to God. But for now, we celebrate our twenty years (and counting).</span></div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-33930738944457618082017-05-08T17:02:00.000-06:002017-05-08T17:46:01.383-06:00Like a Silly Song with LarryBefore I post another weighty blog to follow up with my previous blog about OCD, I thought I'd post a somewhat silly blog as an intermission of sorts. Remember Veggie Tales and Silly Songs with Larry? This is a like that.<br />
<br />
I am an impulsive DIYer. There I said it. I cut or sand or demolish without a whole lot of thought as to what comes next. For any given picture hanging on the wall, there are several nail holes behind it. I think this causes Jeff some stress.<br />
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For example, here is where I took a belt-sander to our perfectly decent wood floors in the dining room.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix_OenIQo174HBoYWU0E-rtqH52YgQppw0c25eVIlA1RI9sGdxtvfd3mxEcto6fsb8V-MJkXHvjwNiMI0W-xa-c4jHaBUeE16T_CZUDnaZFckVQdFKbLog2Bb_3eLHC9QRHvdVspbc570/s1600/IMG_3038.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix_OenIQo174HBoYWU0E-rtqH52YgQppw0c25eVIlA1RI9sGdxtvfd3mxEcto6fsb8V-MJkXHvjwNiMI0W-xa-c4jHaBUeE16T_CZUDnaZFckVQdFKbLog2Bb_3eLHC9QRHvdVspbc570/s320/IMG_3038.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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Jeff's comment was, "Um, why did you do that?" To which I answered, "Well, I wanted to see what the wood looked like underneath." Admittedly, I am not a fan of our wood floors and have far off dreams of replacing them or refinishing them some day. We joke that NOW, I've guaranteed this project be completed since we now have a sanded spot on the floor.<br />
<br />
Shortly after moving in, I pulled the old, metal medicine cabinet out of the wall in the bathroom. I tried to 'finish' the project, but we don't have a table saw, which apparently is something I need to finish the project. So, it looks like this...still:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3xWd5ij28MDgO2cqYcvfQIQC6ZVT7Jyt6Kegt_Bul4ZWuE5zt7gZeuCykdDXp95RIQNDHwh1FWgCrTpF41rCuQyJoUSq0BOOzSwCgXn_FZXaD5XEg9LQu_DSHJHekhSrr2qQviUHWffE/s1600/IMG_3040.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3xWd5ij28MDgO2cqYcvfQIQC6ZVT7Jyt6Kegt_Bul4ZWuE5zt7gZeuCykdDXp95RIQNDHwh1FWgCrTpF41rCuQyJoUSq0BOOzSwCgXn_FZXaD5XEg9LQu_DSHJHekhSrr2qQviUHWffE/s320/IMG_3040.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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Pulling Andrew in on the next project, I convinced him to help me remove the mantel on the fireplace. My 'plan' is to use a huge spruce log that we got from Shelter Pines as a rough hewn mantel piece. It is newly cut and quite sappy. Who knew it took so long for a big ol' hunkin' log to dry. I <i>did</i> read that you should strip the log of its bark. Andrew got pulled into this too.<br />
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When Jeff saw what we did, he said, "Did you have a plan?" Of course, my answer was 'no' but I did mention that thing I read about removing the bark.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrM-xGO2w4tpH8-75zzbYwTpHFZBr7n1kb8Do1dmd-T5uDqGDjHJdBqrHG2R5MCNniWM9tcMrVLrLdm0NLOIhkzVRnMUc4Rku-d-DBmiChyphenhyphencsI9hWmvoibx-xlnLr9LcivqCdvODzEpmo/s1600/IMG_2957.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrM-xGO2w4tpH8-75zzbYwTpHFZBr7n1kb8Do1dmd-T5uDqGDjHJdBqrHG2R5MCNniWM9tcMrVLrLdm0NLOIhkzVRnMUc4Rku-d-DBmiChyphenhyphencsI9hWmvoibx-xlnLr9LcivqCdvODzEpmo/s320/IMG_2957.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Future mantel? Let's hope so. </td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKxWZOx4v9xMFJlUlXcIjSTf9o9aecfLekeo5xvqycF6A8uGatimzahmkCVbilUR-te4ELswQgnUezY_PxQrqTlid0nOfP27ficnu9_xik23APFS7QbMDxfJGXli11AxJT1zMLBEmkIK8/s1600/IMG_2800.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKxWZOx4v9xMFJlUlXcIjSTf9o9aecfLekeo5xvqycF6A8uGatimzahmkCVbilUR-te4ELswQgnUezY_PxQrqTlid0nOfP27ficnu9_xik23APFS7QbMDxfJGXli11AxJT1zMLBEmkIK8/s320/IMG_2800.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hearth without mantel piece</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Oh, speaking of the fireplace hearth. So, I decided it would look better white washed. That's right...the DIY project you can never really come back from. I showed Jeff some photos. He hesitatingly agreed (probably with much fear). I looked up some tutorials....which is a good step for me! And I started. Coat 1. Hmmm. Not 'white' enough. Coat 2. I think one more would be good. Coat 3. Maybe coat 4 will be the magic number.<br />
<br />
<b>Jeff:</b> That is NOT like the pictures you showed me.<br />
<b>Me:</b> Yeah, I know! Hmmmm. It is a slippery slope, Jeff. {Bethany starts researching how to remove paint from brick.}<br />
<br />
Well, you will be happy to know that I found a blog from Australia about removing paint from brick. Apparently, vinegar removes paint. Two gallons of vinegar later, it is 'better' than it used to be. I like it. Jeff is not convinced.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAu-URqZdfSKmzVAaiifdNwZzCD4_PDJsOe5q5RscBpEdYqDUlPv1C23EyoKLfzgV2e3RNROc477hsHJyxgsaKT7ESl5osE1YgI1-laql5qaNbeB9xAbjJSOSqDPjrV9LbmpCgkYN5i-U/s1600/IMG_2802.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAu-URqZdfSKmzVAaiifdNwZzCD4_PDJsOe5q5RscBpEdYqDUlPv1C23EyoKLfzgV2e3RNROc477hsHJyxgsaKT7ESl5osE1YgI1-laql5qaNbeB9xAbjJSOSqDPjrV9LbmpCgkYN5i-U/s320/IMG_2802.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">coat 1</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWn-apxiBfNDp9WzFQQOQ_5lDbe0qqh6BRU0eu1Wm2aNNovw2VHQwvEVVwI3B8S-W3M2P0SMGQXqY623vI3G-Q6KReNwn4vez30xFMORsq5H6ckZD3xGMKuICgT28colZrtDk5e7j8GdA/s1600/IMG_2804.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWn-apxiBfNDp9WzFQQOQ_5lDbe0qqh6BRU0eu1Wm2aNNovw2VHQwvEVVwI3B8S-W3M2P0SMGQXqY623vI3G-Q6KReNwn4vez30xFMORsq5H6ckZD3xGMKuICgT28colZrtDk5e7j8GdA/s320/IMG_2804.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">coat 2, I think.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMOt70YEN7nTTBp4LJKjkGBNkDDxxYVoCPAiBF411JvclAizqxSwsOFWTBNQgZ8rzGAzqH5WvM2YVCvotsswy97RfwhxRZ4i6CvoQ72Eo3feHFqrvQbwnkbKbx0gzmmZTlr3tC1hhEAxM/s1600/IMG_2805.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMOt70YEN7nTTBp4LJKjkGBNkDDxxYVoCPAiBF411JvclAizqxSwsOFWTBNQgZ8rzGAzqH5WvM2YVCvotsswy97RfwhxRZ4i6CvoQ72Eo3feHFqrvQbwnkbKbx0gzmmZTlr3tC1hhEAxM/s320/IMG_2805.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Coat 3 or maybe 4. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsokUvF8iUqFDnc6nUW3AHCzRe-f-nhOirPZEH6HRp3cNekDKQe9vXdxzge4O0LUdvTwmaOv7t1tDy9yvVvheOu_A7SKPT-60qYLw3UgK8tyeXc5eSYwyqKhNMnY5VvjD7pSxpgzZt-vM/s1600/IMG_2956.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsokUvF8iUqFDnc6nUW3AHCzRe-f-nhOirPZEH6HRp3cNekDKQe9vXdxzge4O0LUdvTwmaOv7t1tDy9yvVvheOu_A7SKPT-60qYLw3UgK8tyeXc5eSYwyqKhNMnY5VvjD7pSxpgzZt-vM/s320/IMG_2956.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">After multiple rounds of vinegar.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgZ5z3ftwybWh65MYcNexb8mroEnrWe5D2gynJeJv6AE3smKl3uucYYvAYd8IXGh93g17rDljoe7t5ICqJqirW2sdhuFmJ0cE5spVdwg44mAGxgYLHETQj87rkYP6kshn76wjhTKgFCiM/s1600/IMG_3028.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgZ5z3ftwybWh65MYcNexb8mroEnrWe5D2gynJeJv6AE3smKl3uucYYvAYd8IXGh93g17rDljoe7t5ICqJqirW2sdhuFmJ0cE5spVdwg44mAGxgYLHETQj87rkYP6kshn76wjhTKgFCiM/s320/IMG_3028.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Current condition. Except the very bottom section which is still<br />
sporting coat 4. I think I will apoxy some pallet wood or something<br />
on that surface.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
By the way, I decided to take a hammer to some of the brick. You know, to make it look "old." Andrew said, "Mom! I REALLY don't think that is a good idea. Maybe you should wait until Papa gets home." {I only hit a few places with the hammer...it looks just fine.}<br />
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AND...we did find a new fireplace screen that fits into the archway. Here it is:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFjzmu9sWRdP8TR-dZO-h1SvMLiwuXl2ZcQHbz5AhCC2e5TKIvsAMDBs_oVILEFnEfB0TC7bOGxUWWuacPBpjT1r42P2FmAU8VS9P-E_1dOPxvLoeUSRLwmzJAYi2MsiDC1igrrneTgCI/s1600/FullSizeRender.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="299" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFjzmu9sWRdP8TR-dZO-h1SvMLiwuXl2ZcQHbz5AhCC2e5TKIvsAMDBs_oVILEFnEfB0TC7bOGxUWWuacPBpjT1r42P2FmAU8VS9P-E_1dOPxvLoeUSRLwmzJAYi2MsiDC1igrrneTgCI/s320/FullSizeRender.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Granted, in this room with the fireplace, we also have a hole in the wall. This would be because I thought we could use the dead space under the stairs as storage. However, for a long time I couldn't decide what kind of door I wanted. I finally decided. That is in the works.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd_VlRtDUovaM2yk3i0dXKCqrQN_FUKi1eaNj05kiE9UdLHPosXcbE-ptrJNdZJ43ft9pOhpUVBpbVpRvOrvavQKd2u4L2owkylBdDaVosqF0k3kt0GVI_RIkNJryraljxLZVmscugo3w/s1600/IMG_1925.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd_VlRtDUovaM2yk3i0dXKCqrQN_FUKi1eaNj05kiE9UdLHPosXcbE-ptrJNdZJ43ft9pOhpUVBpbVpRvOrvavQKd2u4L2owkylBdDaVosqF0k3kt0GVI_RIkNJryraljxLZVmscugo3w/s320/IMG_1925.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It looks better than this now. This was 'in process.' <br />
By the way, that is Andrew stripping wall paper off the walls.</td></tr>
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To defend myself, eventually, I get good results. I am a visionary and a demolition addict. I know enough about 'stuff' and tools to be dangerous but occasionally successful. I have a saint of a husband who is exceedingly patient and kind. He is quite handy with tools--thankfully.<br />
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Currently, I am working on restoring an old Amish farm table. So far so good.<br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-91954961832683118072017-03-25T11:05:00.001-06:002017-10-31T14:10:22.791-06:00OCD Part One: It's NOT About a Symmetrically Cut Pie<span style="font-family: inherit;">I've started and stopped this blog post a hundred times! Not only is it a topic that is multi-faceted but it is exposing some of the deepest parts of my crazy! As many of you know and have experienced, there isn't much that I won't say aloud! LOL! However, this topic pushes me past my comfort level in many ways!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;">{</span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline;">You’re all curious now, aren’t you?!</span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;">}</span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This week, for the second time in the past year, I sat waiting in the radiology department for an ultrasound to determine whether or not pathology would be discovered. The first was for a lump I found on my thigh--turns out it was just a lipoma. A lipoma is a fatty mass (</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">because a girl needs more fat in her thighs!</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">). This past week’s visit was to look at some lymph nodes in my neck that have been enlarged for a few months--even though my bloodwork was all normal and the doctor wasn’t too concerned. Chances are, all is well. I am still awaiting the radiologist’s report...but the technician said everything looked within the realm of normal. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">{</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">By the way: </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Here</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> is where the topic starts!!!</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">}</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I have OCD </span></span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">(</span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder</span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">)</span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. My OCD </span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">complicates ANY (and most) situations, especially, anything that has to do with health. I recently needed to block all health sites through my internet filter. </span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ya know why?</span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> {My apologies, in advance, for the crudeness of this description.} Because sites like WebMD, MayoClinic.com and health forums are like ‘porn for the paranoid.’ I call it medical porn. I can’t </span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">not</span><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> look at it. And...all medical google searches lead to cancer and death on the internet! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In contrast to Facebook memes, OCD is NOT about having the picture frames </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">just so</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> on the wall. OCD is NOT a perfectly organized cabinet or drawer. OCD is NOT about a symmetrically cut pie. It can, on the surface, manifest in some of these ways...but these things do not mean you have OCD. You may be a very neat and organized person. You may be a Type A personality. But, if you have OCD then your intrusive and paranoid thoughts and/or compulsive behaviors invade and disrupt your day in a way that leaves you paralyzed and unable to function normally. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The way I describe it is: </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">being held prisoner in your own mind. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Picture this-- an intruder comes into your living room. The intruder ties you up and then proceeds to run around you in circles screaming the same thing at you over and over and over, while you sit there, helpless to stop the madness.</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> It’s a little like that.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I have several different triggers that open the door to that intruder. Health is one of them. It makes things like lumps and lymph nodes an all-consuming, life threatening drama filled saga. It affects my day...or days on end. It can consume me...and then paralyze me.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Just trust God”</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">has often been the advice I get. I wholeheartedly agree that I need to trust God. However, for me, having OCD means that I must engage in a full-contact battle between heart and mind in order to trust. Trusting God, with all things, takes ALL I HAVE. Trusting the Lord will all my heart and leaning NOT on my own understanding (</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Proverbs 3:5</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">) is probably one of the hardest things I struggle to do. I recently saw the verse </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Exodus 14:14</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> with all new eyes. It says,</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> “The Lord Himself will fight for [me]. Just stay calm.”</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> After fighting my intrusive thoughts regarding the enlarged lymph nodes to the point of mental exhaustion, I felt powerless to trust. However, realizing that my God fights for me was hugely freeing. I am learning</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> how to</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> stay calm AND I am learning what </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">my part</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> in that battle is. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I will say that since starting medication nearly 13 years ago, trusting has become attainable. Perhaps moreso, being able to talk with the Lord </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">without</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> the ‘intruder’ screaming at me has become possible.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Through this swollen gland issue, I’ve realized a few things. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">How much fear is a stronghold for me. I desire to see God as my refuge {Psalm 46}.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">How much health has become a very shiny idol. It competes with my affection for God.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">How I need </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">and</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> want to learn how to glorify God in my brokenness. I don’t need to have it ‘all together’ to please or glorify God.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">How glorious the knowledge that the Lord fights my battles FOR me {Exodus 14:14}.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">How deeply loved I am by my God.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I have vowed to not ‘squander the swollen glands.’ I am leaning into God and learning. I am pushing against the fear. I am learning to surrender the things I am tempted to love more than God. I am learning what it means to live, broken, in a broken world as child of a Perfect God who loves me perfectly.</span></span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-70035345119488365512017-01-13T18:24:00.000-07:002017-01-14T19:18:06.587-07:00On Return-Musings and Other Ponderings<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">January 12th marked the one-year anniversary of our re-entry into America following our 5 year, 2 month Nicaraguan adventure.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometimes it feels like we just left Nicaragua and at other times it feels like we’ve been back for more than a year (then I look around at my sparsely furnished home and think of the near panic attack I had in Costco and realize...nope--just a year)! Re-entry back into American life has been AND CONTINUES to be a journey and a process. You simply cannot live outside your passport country and not be changed in some way...in our case...in profound ways! Our re-entry journey has been greatly influenced by several things. We have been warmly enveloped by our new community group here in Colorado for whom we are thankful. We </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">have had the extra blessing of interning (and now working) for people who ‘</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>get it</i></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">.’ We are thankful for God's providential timing of life's events--we were able to officially 'debrief' our time in Nicaragua at Mission Training International's Debriefing and Renewal program BEFORE we officially moved away from Nicaragua and that allowed us to 'say good-bye' in a healthier way than other global workers have the opportunity to do.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It is challenging to summarize such a multi-faceted journey, so I am going to list some thoughts in no particular order.</span></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">The re-entry process is not limited to one year.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Wal-Mart still overwhelms me and I am thankful for Wal-Mart Grocery Pick-Up Service.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’m still amazed by the USPS, UPS and FEDEX.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Not living in ‘<i>everyday-right-outside-your-door-community</i>' is different and at times, hard. I miss the 'sanity loops' and calling for 'Wilson' over the fence.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Not living in chaos is very nice.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My kids miss Nicaragua. That makes me sad </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-style: italic; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">and </span><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">happy. Sad, because I am sad when my kids hurt. Happy because they loved well and were well loved. {</span><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>Paradox: </i></span><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">it is a way of life for those who have called two distinct places </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">home</span><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">.}</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">God provides. Hands down.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Returns. WOW! I am still amazed at the ability to return products to stores! I mean, they often don’t even need your credit card...I want to be like--"Are you sure? Don’t you just want to hold the card? What about a ‘reason’, do you need an essay outlining the reason for my return? You </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">DO</span><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> see that I opened that package, right? I mean I TASTED the food." Seriously, I feel like offering a service of returning things for people because I am just so enamored with the whole process!</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Decision fatigue is a real thing.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Friendships take time...and sometimes waiting is hard.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometimes you really miss the pets you left behind.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Missing the friends you left behind hurts. Entrusting those same friendships to God is crucial.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">I can still pull out some Spanish when I need to. It isn’t pretty...but it never was.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Dry climate hair is WAY easier to ‘do’ than humid climate hair.</span></li>
<li><span style="white-space: pre-wrap;">We walk forward richer in heart and mind because of where we've been...and who we've met...and what we've done (or didn't do).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Inter-dependence is beautiful and America doesn’t necessarily accept or embrace it. I hope we teach our kids that despite America’s preference for ‘</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">pulling one's self up by one's own boot straps</span><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">’, </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">inter-dependence</span><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> is a far more beautiful </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">and</span><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> Biblical way to live.</span></li>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-38779324194851647592016-12-31T17:51:00.000-07:002016-12-31T21:21:12.400-07:00Setting the Stones for 2016I have seen so many parallels this past year as I have read through Exodus and Joshua in Scripture. The stories in these Old Testament books have resonated in my heart and gave me reason to ponder and consider the faithfulness and unchangingness of our loving God.<br />
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Just as God had Joshua instruct 12 men representing the 12 Tribes of Israel to lay down stones as remembrance after they crossed the Jordan River into the Promised Land, I'd like to set out some stones (represented by photos) remembering this past year--a year of re-entry, change, transition and the beginning of re-settling into a 'new land' on the other side of the river that was crossed.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuT8BQjmrTRnvzJWqEiSKBAB9uDdPRkj9TZiJ-yYaL_O_x1XCgVNkUiGNc2ce2rdOjndfBTSzoxK1q1ecPXw3NFskAUoXix-plKkCYkEqhX_SXzEctC8gx6gxRhlpNog-FERXEnr-TWlQ/s1600/IMG_1889.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuT8BQjmrTRnvzJWqEiSKBAB9uDdPRkj9TZiJ-yYaL_O_x1XCgVNkUiGNc2ce2rdOjndfBTSzoxK1q1ecPXw3NFskAUoXix-plKkCYkEqhX_SXzEctC8gx6gxRhlpNog-FERXEnr-TWlQ/s320/IMG_1889.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">a renewed wonder of God's creation in nature<br />
and a beautiful climate in which to enjoy it</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg-b7jVbeVQ_J-naxZ-fNjj5hCm_jrCwtSHsPdGWFO9_1fFsY2WbvxF_c7_6gpQyo8VzAzRmJ8Vt8DI2Ii8AXplDoMyA19H2H5ejQFZ51k4f7_unel6Ac_AaTN7UnrCgJ0YHT0tGXa8FE/s1600/IMG_1766.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg-b7jVbeVQ_J-naxZ-fNjj5hCm_jrCwtSHsPdGWFO9_1fFsY2WbvxF_c7_6gpQyo8VzAzRmJ8Vt8DI2Ii8AXplDoMyA19H2H5ejQFZ51k4f7_unel6Ac_AaTN7UnrCgJ0YHT0tGXa8FE/s320/IMG_1766.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">the blessing of wonderful next door neighbors<br />
(this table was given to us by our next door neighbors)</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRJh8AOEnjrFnPvZKpbGLFT5YdePLBItUlbMEx6a2a08oiMwRydecK1ErxrYQ9JrJn8NpjLSmSpc0Ex8TFjpKtAYQrhtRdQuSDeKqeVgsuoz2StN1BhHVQEcVDrS_4_U1meT4odWreCq8/s1600/IMG_1513.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRJh8AOEnjrFnPvZKpbGLFT5YdePLBItUlbMEx6a2a08oiMwRydecK1ErxrYQ9JrJn8NpjLSmSpc0Ex8TFjpKtAYQrhtRdQuSDeKqeVgsuoz2StN1BhHVQEcVDrS_4_U1meT4odWreCq8/s320/IMG_1513.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">a visual reminder of the host country and amazing community in which we lived</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcsrtHsKmUm5TqbBwKTLEnryKN_COKLfWqn1YRPUJ3bzfxKltdGCm9YfSjwIzhvVXkM8fYcU_I5aZ5qEjwo9qMZXaIiYa7NaNwdiYxK4BrvVPV0j3x28vu7qfK46k6qq9q1x39djl3vAE/s1600/IMG_1123.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcsrtHsKmUm5TqbBwKTLEnryKN_COKLfWqn1YRPUJ3bzfxKltdGCm9YfSjwIzhvVXkM8fYcU_I5aZ5qEjwo9qMZXaIiYa7NaNwdiYxK4BrvVPV0j3x28vu7qfK46k6qq9q1x39djl3vAE/s320/IMG_1123.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lilacs from our yard which speaks to the sweet tenderness of God</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRygS6bNYXGK-iYis7ug1V5SD5FKwKVDLz7ydluTUpzw28fRJypj4A4WdATBQ5kXUk74J3xJC4MGjFv4Fr1wkk3LrOaExNTgmc2Ct24AWBPXh77VJfNaSUJgiVJzQ8ps0WhnScg1ail8Y/s1600/IMG_1031.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRygS6bNYXGK-iYis7ug1V5SD5FKwKVDLz7ydluTUpzw28fRJypj4A4WdATBQ5kXUk74J3xJC4MGjFv4Fr1wkk3LrOaExNTgmc2Ct24AWBPXh77VJfNaSUJgiVJzQ8ps0WhnScg1ail8Y/s320/IMG_1031.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">'new' family pets that have warmed our hearts<br />
after having to leave behind our beloved pets in Nicaragua</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix6BZd9ogEoQ8sjRWQMaMUG3OHMOfQo1wgBG9cfGLZ9o2wSsah95q-KBvFKTHDPwU2BdlBL3Z0kF6m6OrRxpxkRpl4aG7IFrs14eIMTw2YIvEkzIY-4SyejT5Pq-g2o6knthvDSUgTaks/s1600/IMG_0687.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix6BZd9ogEoQ8sjRWQMaMUG3OHMOfQo1wgBG9cfGLZ9o2wSsah95q-KBvFKTHDPwU2BdlBL3Z0kF6m6OrRxpxkRpl4aG7IFrs14eIMTw2YIvEkzIY-4SyejT5Pq-g2o6knthvDSUgTaks/s320/IMG_0687.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">a pair of ducks representing the paradox in which we live this side of Heaven</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcV49FNFukS8__vzd3ZqSlOlXQrVUnAB4shRe3WqlgMlhzR84UB1nU-EyE1Cy1dVd7rf-QxwmTA_QCaFzOHp0l15f6hZe_bAW9I6uwSGxjok-WRjQ7e-Fc8lnRMQvg1HhKDb2kFsmyqZo/s1600/IMG_9568.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcV49FNFukS8__vzd3ZqSlOlXQrVUnAB4shRe3WqlgMlhzR84UB1nU-EyE1Cy1dVd7rf-QxwmTA_QCaFzOHp0l15f6hZe_bAW9I6uwSGxjok-WRjQ7e-Fc8lnRMQvg1HhKDb2kFsmyqZo/s320/IMG_9568.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A pinecone symbolizing the new roles that we will step into<br />
at Shelter Pines--a ministry that allows us to grow <br />
in the ministry of caring for cross-cultural workers</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3SrI8V0MByAyuClar-MTb9owOrrB8hInXraWt-sKWfLEyzCzQegP_T8d1NBhH80dzXzcJs5hqtVcHxA6ZOBu8MS89WRaA6xJqXFoaU50qIv_g-2LRHL-3oEXIJnQZVSIN8f_qF4kiqXw/s1600/IMG_0651.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3SrI8V0MByAyuClar-MTb9owOrrB8hInXraWt-sKWfLEyzCzQegP_T8d1NBhH80dzXzcJs5hqtVcHxA6ZOBu8MS89WRaA6xJqXFoaU50qIv_g-2LRHL-3oEXIJnQZVSIN8f_qF4kiqXw/s320/IMG_0651.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Keys to our 'new' home <br />
(and a great keychain from an even greater friend) <br />
proving God always provides</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMy5n3-24mx0aO8FArJB6bSW2wWLEKMqt6Y94wDO72uz2YK8zpoaRmaUW3rsCibGAQmzS4SwoUA2ms9s0oBs4WWq_9EQ0JC1mNfVXCYo8_12tvhHk7j9IR-7S_jYANM-YaEYuCXJ5eiz8/s1600/IMG_1505.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMy5n3-24mx0aO8FArJB6bSW2wWLEKMqt6Y94wDO72uz2YK8zpoaRmaUW3rsCibGAQmzS4SwoUA2ms9s0oBs4WWq_9EQ0JC1mNfVXCYo8_12tvhHk7j9IR-7S_jYANM-YaEYuCXJ5eiz8/s320/IMG_1505.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">the provision of a welcoming, friendly and community-oriented church </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVtn1d0uFkOulVco4PGFpt7MgN8lD-wd5FmF_POR7jZ41EaoIl17fl6_iO9gsOR-3Gg23ZHl4NQiB6KwwMWSu_6m1kCbvttdSh_E-3MuKtPbmyta5nDTym14yJR5DxvAzz0i6YxxriNXA/s1600/IMG_6062.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVtn1d0uFkOulVco4PGFpt7MgN8lD-wd5FmF_POR7jZ41EaoIl17fl6_iO9gsOR-3Gg23ZHl4NQiB6KwwMWSu_6m1kCbvttdSh_E-3MuKtPbmyta5nDTym14yJR5DxvAzz0i6YxxriNXA/s320/IMG_6062.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">this is Creamy. he is my aunt's cat. she and creamy were so kind as to let us<br />
live with them for a couple of months. we are thankful to our 'in-state' family <br />
who have gone above and beyond in caring for us in so many ways.<br />
<br /></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigfdVFoTQ5xcfbBZG8JMGOepwYBIdctUC030R42vP41Imtx8tuQDzgXp0jVwyb16XvdMpPk5NjUXW5WQUhFI6vcsLH0t_5_p2o4JSlaW1ZabNy9WuzCYxiWnSx3nmPZvIFtQS2ulMbKGc/s1600/IMG_1253.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigfdVFoTQ5xcfbBZG8JMGOepwYBIdctUC030R42vP41Imtx8tuQDzgXp0jVwyb16XvdMpPk5NjUXW5WQUhFI6vcsLH0t_5_p2o4JSlaW1ZabNy9WuzCYxiWnSx3nmPZvIFtQS2ulMbKGc/s320/IMG_1253.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">this dresser represents the many, many 'material' things<br />
that God has so graciously provided for us <br />
through the generosity of others</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcjhovd-uudC0yRDxowfBULxDu3zrkpSjbexnxve9H29AC4d7y380hy6-zAqjPXUb3fjAByClDvxIUkNEsYdrzkDaHRDk1ju8HauAzjnhOLkavJr_WD0VfVlU0mwl7aaVdYx9D4yEXBNA/s1600/IMG_6895-001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcjhovd-uudC0yRDxowfBULxDu3zrkpSjbexnxve9H29AC4d7y380hy6-zAqjPXUb3fjAByClDvxIUkNEsYdrzkDaHRDk1ju8HauAzjnhOLkavJr_WD0VfVlU0mwl7aaVdYx9D4yEXBNA/s320/IMG_6895-001.JPG" width="212" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">since we don't have a photo of our wonderful new friends<br />
who welcomed us into a fun and friendly small group I am using this<br />
photo of the beautiful deer that visit our yard</td></tr>
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Interestingly, there are 12 'stones' pictured above (I didn't plan that intentionally). </div>
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Thank you for journeying with us this past year. We loved seeing our friends from Nicaland who visited us throughout the year. We are so thankful to have met new friends here in Colorado who have welcomed us and embraced our quirky repatriated selves! And props to our kids who have navigated this re-entry journey like champs!</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizikKdCoNM0_VOFo9E-BjCsVlTcuameNs_UqW1taBtdFaBVcSR3Eyo-IYzCNcZtOrpXJxP6bCg_df8kEPFczXkLDL__aIhTUCdxpGMNgwPO-FaNQvbNfdE5jAeXCzWGffxQE2EQxKCj8o/s1600/IMG_9467-001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizikKdCoNM0_VOFo9E-BjCsVlTcuameNs_UqW1taBtdFaBVcSR3Eyo-IYzCNcZtOrpXJxP6bCg_df8kEPFczXkLDL__aIhTUCdxpGMNgwPO-FaNQvbNfdE5jAeXCzWGffxQE2EQxKCj8o/s320/IMG_9467-001.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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<b>Happy New Year!</b></div>
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With LOVE,</div>
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<i>Jeff and Bethany</i></div>
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<i>Andrew, Ella and Noah</i></div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-17423272559534448282016-11-30T07:58:00.000-07:002016-11-30T08:14:35.403-07:00Being Noticed by God in the DetailsSo many people who return from living cross-culturally speak of <i>reverse cultural shock</i>. This shows up especially in the stores--the abundant choices, the selection, the prices, the breadth of stores from which to shop. It overwhelms and paralyzes the newly returned cross-cultural sojourner. Sometimes it goes deeper. There is a judgement placed on the First World. Cross-cultural workers come back and struggle with the 'haves vs. have nots'. They've seen material poverty first hand and struggle to find the balance and acceptance in the abundance that is seemingly everywhere around them.<br />
<br />
I will honestly say that this hasn't been a huge issue for me. Until now. Yet, it's personal. It has illuminated a dark spot in my heart.<br />
<br />
When we lived in Nicaragua, there were a myriad of things that I wanted. However, I had no access to them. {News flash: there is NO Target or Amazon in Nicaragua.} So, I had the false sense of being 'good and holy' in <i>sacrificing</i> the things I wanted for the sake of the call. That was a facade. I see that now.<br />
<br />
Now, as I live in a land of Target, Amazon, and <b>every.single.store.on.the.planet</b> {not to mention that there is a functioning package delivery system} at my fingertips, I find myself stricken with the plague of coveting. The list of 'wants' seems endless. Only this time, there is nothing but self-control standing in the way of getting what I want. The guise of 'holiness' has been shattered.<br />
<br />
So, I pray. I pray for contentment. I pray for self-control. I pray and thank God for His forgiveness when my self-control fails and I come home with a bag of Yankee Candles {even though I had a coupon}.<br />
<br />
AND... I let God know my wants (which are VERY different from needs). In the back of my journal, I have a wish list. No, it's true. I keep a wish list of my <b>wants</b> and I hand that over to God and I try to leave it up to Him on how He'd like to provide for those wants. I've been doing this for nearly 20 years. I've watched God provide for the entire list. The provision doesn't always look like I imagine...but it is always better. God is NOT a Santa Claus...He's way better. He is a LOVING FATHER-GOD from which ALL good things come (<i>James 1:17</i>). He delights in His Children. He delights in me. He lavishes His love on us...and sometimes that looks like the 'stuff' on my wish list.<br />
<br />
When God provides those things on my list, I feel like I've received a hug from God. I realize that sounds child-like and perhaps crazy. Yet, it's true. There is such delight in being 'noticed' by God.<br />
<br />
I will finish this post with a story testifying to the goodness of God in the details.<br />
<br />
<i>On my wish list was written 'Christmas decor'. On Monday, some friends came over and they had four boxes of Christmas decor that they were going to donate to Goodwill after they left our house. They said we could look through the boxes first. We ended up with several strands of lights, evergreen garland, ornaments, and a small Christmas tree. Then on Tuesday, I was informed that I had won the super cute iron/metal snowmen from ESVO, a vocational school ministry in Nicaragua. </i><br />
<br />
I love being noticed by God. I love that He knows the details and desires of my heart...and I love that He redeems them.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-4713549021557131542016-10-06T09:25:00.001-06:002016-10-06T09:25:23.462-06:00Planning Freedom or Living IN FreedomAs I work through the process of 're-entry' [yes, this is still something I am in the process of...it takes longer than you want, think or imagine]...different aspects of American Life stand out to me in a different light.<br />
<br />
As of late, I am keenly aware of the <b><span style="font-family: inherit;">pursuit of planning and perfection</span></b>. Between workout programs, healthy eating philosophies, Pinterest, blogs and a myriad of other sources...there are a million ways to feel inadequate and enslaved by 'the right way to live'.<br />
<br />
From my perspective of having re-arrived in American culture, it seems that we, as believers in Christ, may have lost sight of the <b>freedom</b> that we have in Christ. Let me try to describe what I mean {and this might be super random and all over the place...<i>just warnin' you</i>.}<br />
<br />
There seems to be COUNTLESS rules to 'living right'. Rules prescribed by <i>good </i>people with <i>good</i> intentions...<b>but</b> with potentially '<i><b>not</b> <b>good</b></i>' effects. Pinterest has seemingly endless suggestions on how to decorate, cook, raise kids, dress, organize life, etc. Blogs (yes, I suppose I am guilty of this simply by having a blog) have all sorts of opinions and ideas on 'Christian life' and godly living. Let's not even get started on all the articles about parenting! The thing is...these suggestions, opinions and ideas start to feel a LOT more like 'must-do's', 'should-do's, or worse-- '<b>rules</b>.' From where I am standing, these rules look like they are enslaving us, as believers, rather than affording us the freedom we have to live an abundant life in Christ.<br />
<br />
I find myself spending MORE time reading about and planning how to live that abundant life than actually living that life. What I find is that all the <i>rules</i> of how to live a godly and healthy life are the very things that get in the way of living an abundant life.<br />
<br />
<i>Galatians 5:1</i> says, <b><i>"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery."</i></b><br />
<br />
I can so easily be burdened with the yoke of '<i>what I should do</i>' according to the culture of Pinterest, blogs, articles, social media. There are so many 'good' things that have enslaved me. There are so many yokes that I have carried: pursuit of perfection, guilt over the should-do's but didn'ts, and the yoke of over-planning. How easy it is to get trapped by the 'shoulds' and the plans rather than seeking God, His Word, and the power of the Holy Spirit and His promptings on how to live in the freedom of Christ. I want to live in freedom--freedom that allows me to <b>enjoy</b> life and enjoy God rather than being enslaved by the <i>plans</i> to enjoy life.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-68328716537127129692016-09-14T11:31:00.001-06:002016-09-14T13:31:06.019-06:00Depression's GiftAs some of you know, between April 2014 and March 2015, I experienced a deep depression that was nearly impossible to crawl out from under. The best way that I can describe my experience with depression is that it felt like someone covered me with a heavy, soaking wet wool blanket.<br />
<br />
Heaviness. Darkness. BLESSING.<br />
<br />
Wait, WHAT? Blessing?<br />
<br />
Yes, BLESSING.<br />
<br />
During that year, I leaned into the Lord. I crawled up on God's lap and leaned in to His Love. I read. I camped out in the Psalms. I conversed with God. I journaled. I pondered. I rested.<br />
<br />
See, God makes beauty from ashes. He turns tears into gladness. He redeems. He restores.<br />
<br />
The blessing {gift} that I received at the end of that dark tunnel of depression was this:<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4TLo2fjGQd9cvVJP5w9jKBF0q0SorwjEAbiLhU2jW1nqPILI_8nMab1vp19B2DdzPVhM3vu8RsVLv-YVP7eFvYlJgCJ7zhVlbdtTVOV6YtiUUJIRx2NWeZ_tzD8anlGPnMUN6bHLdz6Y/s1600/loved.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4TLo2fjGQd9cvVJP5w9jKBF0q0SorwjEAbiLhU2jW1nqPILI_8nMab1vp19B2DdzPVhM3vu8RsVLv-YVP7eFvYlJgCJ7zhVlbdtTVOV6YtiUUJIRx2NWeZ_tzD8anlGPnMUN6bHLdz6Y/s320/loved.jpg" width="293" /></a></div>
<br />
Well, I mean, God didn't actually send this necklace to me...<br />
<i>{I had this necklace made as a reminder.}</i><br />
<br />
The gift was a deep, heart knowledge that I AM LOVED. I am loved even if I am NOT productive. I am loved even if I am not effective in ministry. I am loved regardless of whether I accomplish what I think God expects me to do.<br />
<br />
I am loved...<i>just 'cause</i>. I am loved because He loved me first.<br />
<br />
Depression is a huge de-motivator and debilitator--you don't get a whole lot done in the valley. Whatever illusions you had about how your 'work and service to the Lord' was worth something...whatever erroneous theology you believed about how what you 'did' equated to 'how much you were loved' quickly fades away. You are left with nothing. Nothing to show to others. Nothing to show to God...except...yourself. And it is then that you realize that YOU ARE LOVED.<br />
<br />
I learned that God was far more interested in me being WITH Him--the God of the universe--than what I could do FOR Him.<br />
<br />
This isn't everyone's experience with depression. I realize that. This was MY experience...and I am eternally grateful for it. However, I'd encourage you to ponder what it looks like to be loved by God.<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-70487548508793451572016-09-04T13:56:00.000-06:002016-09-04T13:56:30.841-06:00Pumpkin Spice Flavored GuiltA few days ago, I posted on FB about '<i>all things pumpkin spice</i>'. I found these pumpkin spice flavored Keebler Fudge Stripe cookies that made clean eating' a forgotten concept. The whole 'pumpkin spice' industry went gangbusters while we lived in Nicaragua where Autumn doesn't exist. So this fall is the first time we experience the full force of the 'pumpkin spice movement.'<br />
<br />
So what does pumpkin spice have to do with guilt?<br />
<br />
Well, after I posted on FB, one of my friends in Nicaragua replied, in good humor, to my post. Reminding me how 'those on the other side feel about posts such as these.' ENTER GUILT.<br />
<br />
It was then that I realized that I am hovering between two worlds--the one I left in January and the one I now find myself in currently. In that first year of living in Nicaragua, I remember making the analogy of a trapeze artist. I had let go of one swing in the U.S. but had not yet grabbed fully onto the next swing in Nicaragua. Now, I find myself on that trapeze again. I have let go of the Nicaraguan swing and I have, perhaps, grabbed hold of the U.S. swing. But I am still hanging there--swinging back and forth. I feel suspended, in a way, between the two worlds--the world of pumpkin spice and the world without autumn. It is an interesting and conflicting place to hang. See, it is when you swing here in the 'in between' that things like pumpkin spice cookies take on a whole new meaning and weight.<br />
<br />
Perhaps, for the general public reading this post, it seems I am over-processing this whole pumpkin spice thing. Perhaps, it is a re-entry thing. Perhaps, it is again one of those things that can't be explained outside the world of those who have lived and returned from serving cross-culturally.<br />
<br />
Either way, it will probably be a while before the 'special treats' of the seasons here in <b>this</b> world get taken for granted in our home. After all, eggnog isn't on the shelves yet!<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-55705838543257157632016-08-07T20:25:00.001-06:002016-08-08T11:59:13.553-06:00Things BorrowedI've probably blogged about this topic before, but I don't remember, so here I go again.<br />
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<b>Independence.</b> We really like that word in American culture. We fought for independence. We fight for the independence of others. We strive for independence as adolescents. We raise our kids to be independent. We celebrate independence. <br />
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The opposite of independence is...<br />
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That's right.<br />
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<b>DEPENDENCE [or as someone recently suggested INTER-DEPENDENCE].</b><br />
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Yeah, we don't like that word as much. It conjures up negative feelings. It sounds weak.<br />
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However, <i>independence</i> isn't a squeaky clean word. There seems to be a flip side to independence. Perhaps we could label it...<b>pride</b>.<br />
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As a family of believers in Christ, or perhaps even more basic...a family of human beings, dependence can be healthy. I think that '<i><b>healthy dependence (or inter-dependence)</b></i>' is something we learned while we lived in community in Nicaragua. We were dependent on each other for many things--practically and relationally.</div>
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We shared. We borrowed. We lent. </div>
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We really wanted to carry this concept back with us from Nicaragua. After all, it is a Biblical concept according to <i>Acts 4:32, </i>which says, <b>"All the believers were united in heart and mind. And they felt that what they owned was not their own, so they shared everything they had." </b> Of course, God doesn't force us to share. If he did, we'd all look a lot like a toddler aged child who is forced to hand over a toy to another toddler. <i>2 Corinthians 9: 7-8</i> says: <b>"You must each decide in your heart how much to give. And don't give reluctantly or in response to pressure. For God loves a person who gives cheerfully. And God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need and plenty left over to share with others." </b></div>
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So, real life story here. We only own one car. We have been able to borrow a car from Shelter Pines for the last several months but this week we need to return that car. We started looking at used cars...and car loans. UGH. We can't <i>really</i> afford a second car. However, on the days that Jeff works, the kids and I have different activities and errands that need to be run--namely, homeschool co-op. I honestly considered just Uber-ing on homeschool co-op day. </div>
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As I was doing some car loan research, I felt strongly that I should text a friend that I only just met in February (she is a friend of one of my closest friends in Nicaragua) AND I seem to only text her when I need something. So for a second, I thought to myself that perhaps I shouldn't text her at the risk of being that overly needy friend. [This is where prideful independence walks into the room.] Pushing that thought aside, I texted her about our need for a car. She immediately texted back that she <b>did</b> <b>know</b> of a car we could borrow.</div>
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Meet O.B. (O.B.'s family names all their cars.) </div>
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O.B. is a 2001 Subaru Outback, 5 Speed Manual AWD wagon [believe it or not--I have REALLY missed driving a stick shift!]. My new friend's brother has generously loaned us O.B. for about a month or so! Ironically, this is the type of car we were thinking of purchasing--so now we get to do a really long 'test drive' of sorts.</div>
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Will we be able to afford a second car in a month? I don't know. What I DO know is that I felt prompted by God to ask for help from a friend rather than independently forge ahead. God <b>will</b> meet us where we are NEXT month. I learned in January that God provides day by day. I don't need to worry about next month.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-15867811590991801842016-07-30T21:17:00.001-06:002016-07-30T21:17:11.567-06:00Kinda Like Childbirth and Toddlerhood: Fond Memories and Pain AmnesiaWe recently had the blessing of getting together with some friends whom we had met when we did our cross-cultural training six years ago. They are serving in Europe and they will go back for another term at the end of the summer.<br />
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I loved seeing them. AND, seeing them made me realize a few things. <br />
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<li>I am still very much processing our time in Nicaragua. I realized this as I heard myself start every other sentence with: "When we were in Nicaragua...." </li>
<li>While I want to work with missionaries in the member care arena, I am not 'there' yet. During our time of debriefing last summer, the analogy of a "Transition Bridge" was illustrated. We have crossed over the 'chaos' portion of the bridge, but we are still in the 'resettling' zone and I believe we need to be further into the 're-settling' zone (or even 'settled' zone) before I am ready to really come alongside others in an objective, helpful and healthy way. </li>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJb5pZk-jnUrcfbKUV0p-yrFr1hF_W0gF5VX04_peILKm5ob35755Nl_G-kGdRYql72VYaB8OP7iWH1-0JNODZqtf1l0ax_Llaay30zol5zBfhMKC5z9KSaDzwquriiW6LBNvvPp_eirs/s1600/transition+bridge.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJb5pZk-jnUrcfbKUV0p-yrFr1hF_W0gF5VX04_peILKm5ob35755Nl_G-kGdRYql72VYaB8OP7iWH1-0JNODZqtf1l0ax_Llaay30zol5zBfhMKC5z9KSaDzwquriiW6LBNvvPp_eirs/s320/transition+bridge.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Transition Bridge</td></tr>
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I found myself feeling a little envious that they will return to their host country in a few weeks. <i>Crazy, right?</i> I think that 'serving cross-culturally' is like pregnancy (or the toddler years of my kids) for me. That season was really, REALLY hard but I seem to only remember the sweet moments. OR it could be analogous to childbirth. Several months after giving birth, I had pain amnesia. The pain memories had faded and I only remembered the sweetness of holding my newborn for the first time. Yet, I am thankful for the sweet memories I have of our time in Nicaragua. That time changed me profoundly. I am grateful to have experienced that depth of change. I also made sweet, sweet friends who may be far away now, but I will have for forever in Eternity.</div>
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This re-settling thing is interesting for sure. Thanks for walking it out with me.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-33799231482789940042016-07-22T08:14:00.002-06:002016-07-22T08:17:11.521-06:00"The Follow-Up"I am so glad that people took me up on my offer to email and push back on my last blog regarding "dichotomies" and "newsletters." Some of the responses that I've received have given me much to think about and reconsider. Sometimes I want to take a grey issue and make it black and white. But alas, God speaks of mystery and things we can not understand...and those are colored grey! As a research-obsessed nerd, I am enjoying digging into Scripture to find greater clarity. It is fun!<br />
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I have been stretched and challenged. It's a good thing to be stretched and challenged. I will continue to ponder these issues. </div>
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<i>A few thoughts or conclusions:</i></div>
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<li>The connections that my mind makes between things are NOT the connections that other people's minds make between things...or at least not to the same degree. For example, the issue of a missionary's newsletter writing and accountability to donors (in relation to raising support) is not necessarily related to the spiritual vs. secular dichotomy in the minds of others.</li>
<li><i style="font-weight: bold;">The secular vs. spiritual dichotomy is the main issue that motivated me to write a post.</i> In processing aspects of this blog post with my kids, it became clear to me that I want to be certain that our family doesn't give credit to the notion that one job is more 'valuable' or 'worthy' in God's eyes than another provided that they are glorifying Him in what they do. It was an enlightening conversation as I asked them to label jobs as 'secular' or 'spiritual'. We then debriefed the effect of that labeling and discussed that as believers in Christ there should not be a difference in professions based on the verse of <i>1 Corinthians 10:31</i>.</li>
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As I said in the original post, I am NOT opposed to sending a newsletter or being held accountable to others. Communication and accountability between donor and receiver was not and is not my main point--it was an example of the dichotomy, that in my mind, made sense. It might just be in MY mind! Scripturally there is clear evidence of missional giving, financial responsibility, accountability <i>and</i> partnering with one another in God's Work. We certainly have enjoyed the privilege to partner with others in whatever and wherever God has placed us. </div>
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As I process our time in Nicaragua, I have had the opportunity to see things from a slightly different perspective -- 'margin' and lower humidity do that! I might post other controversial musings. I hope you will stay engaged. I promise to post fun stuff in between the serious stuff! </div>
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***[Feel free to continue to email me your thoughts regarding this...this follow-up is not the end of the discussion!]***</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-20941589998443933922016-07-21T08:08:00.000-06:002016-07-21T08:08:22.324-06:00The False Dichotomy and the Ensuing StruggleAre you ready for a controversial post (or what might turn into a series of posts)?<br />
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Ok, here we go...<br />
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<b>"While we believe there is an inherent separation between things that are of God and of "not God," we uphold that what is often touted as the dichotomy between the sacred and secular is largely false. God is God of all. The Holy Spirit is also at work in practices that happen outside of what gets labeled "church" and "ministry."</b> <i>(</i>From the book <i>Faith Coaching)</i><br />
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That largely false dichotomy between sacred and secular bothers me. This divide between realms has been especially bothersome to me in light of our shift from our work cross-culturally (labeled missions) and our current situation stateside (labeled bi-vocational ministry).<br />
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As you know, historically we have sent out newsletters (or updates) every other month for over five years. Now, hear me when I say that I am not opposed to sharing what is happening in our life and ministry--but I<b><i> am</i></b> opposed to the idea that I am required to give a report because <b>what we do</b> falls into some sort of 'ministry' category that necessitates a report. Let's flip it around -- I don't expect anyone to send me a report of what they do at their jobs at banks, schools, businesses, or engineering firms. Of course, amongst friends, I am more than happy to hear what you are doing and how God may be working through you in your workplaces, but I don't have the expectation that you will send me a newsletter outlining the details of that. So, that makes me wonder...<i>why is this expected of me</i>? Again, it's not that I don't <i>want</i> to share what is going on...but rather because I question the motivation of <b><i>why</i></b> it is 'expected' that I share. I think that the answer in that lies in the chasm that is created by this dichotomy.<br />
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That dichotomy has some nasty side effects. It can tempt those on the "ministry side" to embellish/skew/alter the news they share or even hide certain aspects of life. This is dangerous. This starts to effect one's own personal view of their life...or even their 'worthiness.' On the other side of this dichotomy, someone who works on the "secular side" may question their worthiness in God's Kingdom. Yet, if we look at<i> 1 Corinthians 10:31</i> which says -- <b>"Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God"</b> -- then whether I work work at homeless shelter or on Wall Street, it matters <i>only </i>that I should be doing what I'm doing for the glory of God.<br />
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Is there a difference between things of Earth and things of Heaven? YES. But as the quote with which I started states..."<b>God is God of all</b>." I am both <b>struck</b> and <b>stuck</b> at the divide we create (and allow) between that which happens in the 'secular' work place and the 'ministry' work place. It gets even more complicated when you throw "raising support" into the discussion. (That might necessitate a 'part 2' to this blog post!) And now that I've sent Pandora's box lid flying, let me just say that I feel like I've only scratched the service. I think so far, we are merely looking at a meta-theme when it comes to dichotomies that exist in the Christian culture. We can get a lot smaller (and controversial) than this. Dare I mention the dichotomy that exists between stateside ministry vs. overseas missions OR missionaries to un-reached vs. reached cultures.<br />
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So...what do you think?<br />
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<i>Do you believe this dichotomy exists?</i><br />
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<i>Where do you see yourself acknowledging a gap where God doesn't intend one to exist?</i><br />
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<i>Are there jobs that are more 'holy' or 'worthy' than others? Would you rank these jobs as having different 'value' or 'significance': pastor, ditch digger, barista, doctor, missionary, stay-at-home mom, banker, teacher?</i><br />
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Clearly, this is something that I am pondering deeply, especially, since returning stateside. While I love a good debate, I <b><i>hope</i></b> my motivation for bringing this to light functions more to help close the gap that has been allowed between the 'secular and the spiritual'. I mean, really, if you think about it...we'd live so much more integrated lives if we close that gap. Of course, that is far easier blogged than done.<br />
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[End rant.]<br />
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I'd love to hear your thoughts on all this.<br />
Email me.<br />
Seriously.<br />
You can even push back a little.<br />
Ready? GO!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3732679719896363459.post-92051252790210294652016-07-17T14:36:00.003-06:002016-07-17T15:02:45.800-06:00Reflecting CreativityAs some of you know, I have been working on and documenting my DIY coffee table project. Now, I'll be the first to admit...I, generally, am <b>not</b> a fan of DIY posts. Yeah, it's true. I am not a big fan of Pinterest...but I do have a Pinterest account. My dislike of these things is not because I don't like the stuff...but it is SUCH a temptation to compare myself to others and then take that comparison and let it affect my sense of self-worth. And admittedly, I am quick to judge it as being superficial and show-off-y. Yet...<br />
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There is another side to DIY posts and the sharing of creative ideas. We are, after all, created in God's image...and none is more CREATIVE than HE. He has decorated this world far more intricately and beautifully than our minds can truly comprehend. He cares about the 'environment' in which we live and enjoy Him. He adorns this world with amazing and beautiful things. As image-bearers of God, we reflect and express that creativity. Some of us 'express' God's creativity in ways that can be easily pinned to a Pinterest board...others reflect and express it in more linear and scientific ways. Thus, the 'showing off' of DIY projects in its purest form may be an expression of creativity that has been gifted to us by God. For example, my friend Yeymi in Nicaragua enjoys making amazing creations out of fomi. She will use these creations as gifts to bless others. Yeymi reflects God's creativity [<i>Yeymi se refleja la creatividad de Dios.</i>]. DIY projects are not a first world luxury. Creating and constructing are not bound by culture or economics. Creativity and its expression is inherent in being God's created.<br />
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For me, 'creating' is an outlet and expression that I really enjoy. I like building, painting, constructing, and using power tools. It touches a place deeper inside my spirit. While we lived in Nicaragua, I didn't have the bandwidth in my spirit to fully express this creativity. It was, at times, stifling. Admittedly, now, I have more margin for my creative expression...not to mention a pile of free pallets! I have really enjoyed the opportunity, as of late, to 'be creative' in building furniture. I do love functional and unique creations! It is even therapeutic and <i>worshipful</i>. I listen to music and spend time conversing with God as I sand or paint. I get to exercise the part of me that reflects God's Creativity. It is a way for me to glorify God.<br />
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Just for fun...here is a picture of the coffee table that I made from a pallet. NOW, <b>don't</b> be like me and be tempted to compare yourself. But<b> DO</b> take a minute to ponder the amazing ways that you bear the image of God.<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com