Measured
Oh wow. It has been a very, very long time since I have posted a blog. But, here I am again. I recently wrote a little article for our homeschool co-op and thought I'd share it here as well.
Over the last year or so, I’ve become increasingly aware of my insecurities as a homeschooling mom. What’s odd is that I have been homeschooling for about 9 years--but the first several years of homeschooling were spent outside the United States where I was one of the only homeschoolers in our missionary community. Moving to a homeschool-saturated area sparked the temptation to compare myself to other homeschooling moms around me. All it would take was seeing another mom’s post on Facebook or overhearing a conversation about a child’s accomplishments or even a simple assignment and I would be off and running down a dark road of doubt and insecurity about how I had “messed up my kids for life.”
The Lord met me in these dark places and shined His light into the insecure, doubt-filled darkness. A few new thoughts emerged as I leaned in and listened to the Lord:
1. While the world around me uses measurements like grades, standardized test scores, and degrees, the only “measure” I need is God’s Word.
2. Influences like social media, Pinterest, homeschooling blogs and websites feed the insatiable sin nature of comparison! Comparison leads to discontentment, self-doubt, and insecurity. That insecurity leads to relying on self and the temporal things of this world. On the flip-side, comparison can also lead to self-righteousness, pride, and an unteachable spirit.
3. God has a plan for each one of my children and the preparation for that plan includes me as a homeschooling mom. The preparation may not match what the world considers preparation.
In 2 Peter 1:2-4 it says, “His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us to His own glory and excellence...having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire.” For me, that corruption often looks like comparison and grasping for control over all things as a homeschooling mom. I need to be reminded that while “some trust in chariots and some in horses {things of the world like curriculum, programs, scores, degrees, salaries}, but [I] trust in the name of the LORD our God. (Psalm 20:7) This particular verse in Psalm 20 has shed so much light on the hope I put in everything except God! Yes, I am to train my children, teach my children, sometimes even test my children; however, my hope and trust needs to be in the Lord and His standards and measurements rather than in the standards and measurements of the world. I need to entrust unto Jesus my children and their futures. He has proven through Scripture that His sovereign plans come to pass and He even uses the people that society views as “not properly educated or prepared” to bring Him Glory through those plans.
Personally, I needed to “turn off” the societal voices around me that were distracting me from God’s voice and direction. With God’s grace and strength, I try to remember that God has His own “Individualized Education Plan” for each one of my kids that is designed by Him for His Glory and their good. While there may be the temptation to read this and get caught in the trap of comparison, I hope it acts as the impetus for conversation--with God. Let me encourage you to ask yourself these questions:
1. Do you trust that God loves you, your child(ren) and has a plan for each one of you?
2. What worldly measurements are deceiving you and creating self-doubt and insecurity? What comparisons are you making that steal from you the contentment and security found in Jesus and His provision for all things that pertain to life?
3. What distractions are keeping you from hearing God’s voice, especially as it relates to motherhood?
My prayer for you, the readers, is that Jesus may be your measure and guide as you seek to follow Him. To God be the Glory.
